Review of Suspiria

Suspiria (I) (2018)
Too Long. Too Slow. And Too Far Up Its Own Ass.
15 September 2019
Gone is the exaggerated colour palette, the elaborate set pieces, the nightmarish soundtrack & the no-nonsense premise of the original. In fact, Luca Guadagnino's Suspiria departs from everything that made Dario Argento's horror classic unique, and is a dull, dismal & divisive remake that's exhausting, frustrating & one hell of a slog.

Unlike the 1977 original, this one employs muted colours, shrivelled set design, slow-burn approach, hypnotic score & an unnecessarily drawn out narrative that piles one needless segment on top of another, resulting in an overlong flick that exceeds the original's length by a considerable margin, and will test the patience of most viewers.

Aiming for more than a straightforward supernatural horror, Guadagnino retains the themes of the original but is more interested in exploring the political unrest of the depicted timeline, not because the plot calls for it but because he wants to. While some will admire his choice to not rehash the same story, others will argue that his reach far exceeds his grasp here.

On the plus side, the eerie mood & foreboding aura never leaves the room, some kills are downright terrifying, the earthy tones do fit its depressing tone, that Volk dance sequence is truly a highlight, Make-up is top-notch, and Thom Yorke's score just fits. As for the performances, Tilda Swinton steals the show by taking the role of not one, not two but three different characters, and she excels at all of them.

Overall, Suspiria does retain the original's title but everything about it is different. More a homage than a full-fledged remake, it is an abstract re-imagination that attempts to tackle themes & elements that it could've done without, and comes stuffed with an unwarranted subplot that's detrimental to the viewing experience. In short, Luca Guadagnino's Suspiria is too long, too slow & too far up its own ass.
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