Review of No Holds Barred

3/10
Terrible & Funny 80s Kitch
14 June 2020
Warning: Spoilers
This movie has some of the best or depending on your viewpoint worst overacting and cliches put down to film in the 1980s. Hulk Hogan is Rip, a wrestling champion with a heart of gold and he doesn't want go join the TV Network of an evil corporate scumbag called Brell and things escalate from there.

Among other great things this has Hulk wearing several sort of reject satin sleeveless ninja outfits in multiple colours sort of like he actually wore in the 1980s. There is growling by Hulk as well as the villain named Zeus played by another wrestler who went on to appear in many better movies than Hulk could ever dream of. Some of the audience also growls and grunts and most of the villains are one dimensional.

It has a bad plot and bad yet funny and grammatically incorrect dialogue such as:

He's did it again (He is did it again. Really?) "I won't be around when this check clears" after force feeding the bad guy his cheque. "God I hate it when you're hurt, or scared" to a woman that's been attacked and almost sexually assaulted. These and some other verbal gems make this movie what it is today. Utter crap.

There are impossible feats of strength exhibited by wrestlers tholroughout. Like kicking the limo back door so hard from the inside that it makes the driver in his partition completely lose control. Jumping through the roof of said limo as if it is made of plywood and paper. The Hulk also mistakes a mirror for a bad guy at one point because a projector is projecting his image into it and he makes a bad guy pee himself among other things. And there is a romantic scenario and a few sexual jokes and allusions towards masturbation just to make it appealing to the adult viewers I guess. The levels of machismo are also off the charts where Rip doubts himself when he refuses a challenge by Zeus to fight. That lasts until his brother is injured by Zeus and then it's on. The bad guys kidnap Rip's love interets and he is beaten until she escapes and then he fights back and wins. It has to be seen to be believed.

In short this movie might have been enjoyed by 8 year olds in 1989 which is how old I was when I saw it but in 2020 it is ridiculously and completely bad. It might make you grin a few times in the beginning but it is by no means a decent film even with the unintentional humor. Possibly a 3 out of 10
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