Kill 'Em All (2017)
6/10
JVD back at what he does best... Kicking Arse...
16 September 2020
My Ratings: Story 1.00 : Direction 1.00 : Pace 1.25 : Acting 1.25 : Entertaining 1.25 Total 5.75 out of 10

So here we go... a leave your brain at the door extravaganza. This is what the Kickboxer King does best. Though, this is not his best film by a longshot. It is, as always, a thoroughly enjoyable waste of time. Who doesn't enjoy watching the bad guys getting their arses well and truly... and literally... kicked.

This isn't your basic revenge story, it has a little backstory to it that differs a tad from the usual fodder. Maybe this is why it needed three writers. Philip's dad is killed by the bad men, and Phil, quite rightly, wants revenge. So he trains, gets into shape, learns to kill, and then... well, he joins the bad men. Wait a minute, doesn't this mean he has to be like them, thus in effect, becoming them? Oh sorry, forgot to take my brain out. That's better. Now don't think about it, just admire and enjoy the kick-arsery. YEAH.

However, when Phil makes his move, he messes up and gets shot. After arriving at the hospital via an ambulance - why didn't the bad men finish him off... oops, thinking again. His gang mates turn up to finish the job. Not at all concerned about it being a public hospital.

Luckily for Phil, there's nurse Suzy to tend to his boo-boos and fix him up enough to kick arse. There's even a female bad guy so Nurse Suzy can flex her muscles and not feel too left out in the foot-to-arse stakes.

Mostly, the direction is average, though Director Peter Malota does a nice job with the pacing. This slow to begin with but speeds up nicely when the action starts. There are a couple of sections where he slows it down to help the story and to give the viewers a breather.

The shame about the whole affair though is the acting. Now I have, nothing but respect for Peter Stormare, he is a great actor (can you sense a but coming (?)), but (yeah, there it is) he feels as though he's not too fussed to be there. Maybe he needed to pay the utility bills that month and was running short. Just wish he'd put more heart into it. Truthfully, most of the cast seems nonplussed and lacking in the characterisations department. Good job they make up for it in the punching, kicking, and gouging division. Though I will say, Daniel Bernhardt does a great job and both Autumn Reeser and Maria Conchita Alonso have their moments.

That said, the most entertaining scene of the whole film is the father and son fight between Mr and Master Van-Damme. They ought to thank god their family isn't a dysfunctional one. I would hate to see their drunken Friday night slugfest after an argument... I take that back, I would love to see it, and in this movie you do.

This isn't a masterpiece of filmmaking or storytelling, but it is so enjoyable that I would happily recommend this to all the fans of Martial Arts Action Films and to those wondering what the fuss is about. Grab a beer, disengage the brain, sit back, and enjoy. Cheers.

Please kick arse over to my The Game Is Afoot and Holding Out For A Hero lists to see where this slice of Van-Damage ranks. Hopefully, you may find your next viewing pleasure too.

Take Care & Stay Well,
2 out of 3 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink

Recently Viewed