Top Gunner (2020)
1/10
The level of stupidity involved hurts.
18 November 2020
Another title for this is 'Wingmen Under Siege.' That doesn't change the fact that this is garbage.

Picked this one up at Wal-Mart and I feel ripped off. The cover shows F/A-18 Hornets with an American aircraft carrier under attack with cheap Photo Shop. I was led to believe that it would involve US Navy pilots defending their carrier against a threat. Nope. Instead these are US Air Force pilots, not even pilots-they are training cadets to become pilots.

Review: So, an American 'Special Forces team' of some sorts, are conducting a black operations in Baja California, Mexico. They take down criminals conducting a handoff for a device that I call 'The McGuffin' because that's all it is, it just furthers the plot but has no stakes. It's a biological agent that attacks a person's DNA, but it's never shown doing so. Anyway, the Special Forces seize the McGuffin and evacuate via a CGI stealth plane.

At the same time, a four US Air Force lieutenants are undergoing pilot training at a top secret base that also happens to be in Baja California, Mexico. To train these Air Force pilots, they're using Navy and Marine F/A-18 Hornets? These are cadets and yet they're already flying $30 million aircraft? If they were actual Air Force pilots-in-training they would be flying T-6 Texan II, T-37, T-38 trainers. In addition, why would they be at secret base in Mexico for pilot training? The logic doesn't make sense.

To add to the funny, I figured before the movie even started that this whole production was done on the cheap, that they would not show the 'pilots' getting into, or out of, or show any other exterior portion of their aircraft and I was correct. In some scenes you can see the engine cowlings behind the cockpit and a single, vertical, tail. The Hornet has two angled tails. At first I thought it was an A-4 Skyhawk, but the position of the engine cowlings is higher and just behind the cockpit. I think it's a Aero L-39 Albatros, a two-seat trainer. This was filmed in New Mexico and Jet Warbird Training Center is in Santa Fe. You can rent aircraft there by the hour to train with, and you can even fly a MiG-15!

To pick on the set design further, all the firearms used are airsoft. The muzzle flashes, discarding shell casings, all of it is cheap CGI. In one scene, the cadets are conducting weapons qualifications with M-16s and CAR-15s. One pilot is standing shoulder to shoulder with a buddy and firing at full auto with the 'casings' spitting out. If it were real, those hot casings would be hitting his buddy in the face or go down his collar and into his uniform. Other aspects, like their uniforms, is not worn properly or not accurate for their rank and branch. I'm guessing the production rented the facilities at the airport, got some friends who are in airsoft-judging by their attire, and raided a local military surplus store to get what else they needed.

Back to the story;

The 'commandos' aircraft's fuel pump is damaged during the escape, and they have two wounded. So they set down at a top secret base called Asan. The cockpit interior for this stealth aircraft is a flight simulator. The exterior of the cockpit is black even though they're landing in broad daylight. The hard landing damages their aircraft, and the commando's commanding officer dies of his wounds from a shot that somehow pierced the aircraft without anyone noticing his wound or a hole in the airframe. The new commando team leader implores the Colonel that they must get the McGuffin to the US within 18 hours. Also, apparently ALL Asan base personnel are away for holiday leave except the Colonel, Master Sergeant, and the four cadets. I mean ALL base personnel, including the Security Police. One of the cadets blows the secrecy of the mission when his cellphone call to the States is intercepted by the Russians.

The Russians mount an attack on Asan with poorly designed CGI aircraft. Their first wave of attackers was, as the Colonel said, four Mi-20 helicopters. Those are transports. However, when the cadets take off in their Hornets to intercept-they are now Mi-26 attack helicopters. In this dogfight, all four helicopters are shot down and one Hornet is damaged.

In the next attack, the Russians use a single Su-57 'Felon', Russia's first stealth aircraft that is somewhat similar in appearance to our F-22 and YF-23. The three remaining Hornets rise to intercept and one is quickly shot down by the Felon. The two remaining Hornets conduct a Thach Weave, crossing paths to lure the Felon to jump on one and enable the other Hornet to get behind and engage. This is the dumbest part of the whole movie, and that's saying something. The Felon takes the bait and jumps onto one Hornet that rapidly climbs. The Felon also climbs. The second Hornet is directly behind the Felon, at point blank range for fighters. This idiotic cadet, his aircraft intact and fully armed, ejects and rams his multi-million aircraft into the Su-57. WHY?! He didn't even try to use his M61 Vulcan cannon, the Felon's stealth abilities are lost in visual range. So we just lost an aircraft worth over $30 million dollars because a cadet doesn't understand how a cannon works. To add to the taxpayer's woes, the baiting Hornet's pilot is equally as stupid. Her aircraft is intact and no longer in danger, so she just bails outs. Yep. Two Hornets, worth over $60 million are lost because two fools at the stick do not know how to fly and fight.

So now there's only one Hornet left, and it's not airworthy. The only 'mechanic' they have, which is one of the cadets, is working on it. The 'Hornet' is inside one of the hangers and they try to crop the shots but you can still see civilian single-engine aircraft in frame.

So the Russians come again, this time they bring in Mi-24 'Hind' helicopters that drop 'Spetsnaz' onto the base. The pilots and remaining commandos take off into the woods to get an extraction. Typical for the military in Hollywood-their extraction is delayed and they 'just hold on a little longer'. Well, the Spetsnaz catch up. So the Americans ambush the Spetnaz by having enough time to set up a Punji trap and is shot. Another gets jumped by the Air Force Master Sergeant and stabbed in the back. The others are shot. One of the commandos is a female sniper, and she's killed in the firefight. They have to leave her body behind to keep going, and they also decide to just leave her with the Barrett .50 caliber anti-materiel rifle that still has ammunition.

There's some convoluted reason why, the Americans go back to base that's been overrun, and are quickly captured by the Russians. The McGuffin is taken by them and the Russians leave in their helicopters. Instead of just executing their prisoners and leaving, the remaining Russian guards are jumped and overwhelmed by said prisoners whom then take the supposedly disabled Stealth aircraft from the beginning and give chase. They catch up to and shoot down the Russian 'Boss'. Once more, typical of Hollywood, the plummeting of several thousand feet in a burning helicopter doesn't kill the Boss on impact. He staggers out of the wreckage and is chased by one of the cadets. The pair have their mano a mano fight, and, of course, the cadet wins.

The McGuffin is secured and handed over to the Spooks, who wear Russian gas-masks even though they're suppose to be Americans. Blah blah, patriotic narration and flying jets in formation with cheesy uplifting music. The end.

This film's logic was so painful that I had to stop and come back to it several times to ensure that I wasn't making all of this up. Nothing in this film makes sense, the plot, the characters, the set, nothing adds up. I was so fed up that I mailed my copy back to the distributors because Wal-Mart doesn't accept DVD returns.
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