I reviewed this movie on YouTube many years ago, but that channel was outlawed due to numerous community guideline breaches.
The one aspect of this movie I remember most is one particular character dying in an outhouse but reappearing near the end somehow.
It's like the director edited it all wrong and out of order.
The whole ending is a jumbled mess of confusion.
We're introduced to Sandy, who's cheating on Danny with Ritchie from 'The Wanderers.' I don't know what happened just then, but I believe a passing train impaled them both.
Is the train the killer in this?
Some intro music - what am I watching, 'Dallas' or 'Starsky and Hutch?'
Meanwhile, in Pleasantville, daffy elevator music plays as the cookie-cutter community goes about their daily routine in the suburbs.
The body-positive sheriff is introduced, and it leaves you wondering how he passed his physical to join law enforcement, as I believe it's a requirement to swim laps without sinking like an anvil.
Corny music like in a 'Convoy' barroom brawl scene in a horror movie? Establish yourself already, movie; the start is a mess.
From what I can gather, survivors from 'The Burning' return to their post-traumatic lives, or what's left of them, where a town pervert named Casey acts as the movie's decoy, pretending to be a suspected murderer.
The killer train nearly claimed another life while Casey is in the shadows cheering at the near miss, which only adds to his sinister background and character.
Oh, look! It's Daisy Moses preparing apple pie. What's she doing in this? It is a town full of Georgians, after all, so I guess it makes sense. They are Georgian accents, right?
Is that Lisa from 'Weird Science?'
Creepy Casey does his profile no good by hanging around a children's carousel at a carnival where the height requirement to ride it is no more than 3 feet tall. He does his best to ride for free but is busted and runs off in shame with his pockets full of candy and his cover blown. It's not cool for that pervert to ride it, but the rest of the juvenile cast have no problem with it and ride it like the big kids they are.
Don't you just hate Mongo beefhead characters like this Diddle twit in the movie? There was a Diddle character in most 80s movies, and ten times out of ten, they ruined the experience.
As if all these preppy hotties would hang around him.
Is that Prescilla Presley?
The giant man child, Diddle, suffering from attention-deficient deprivation, wants to be the center of attention in the movie and acts like the class clown by overacting his hand in an attempt to be funny. He's so blinded by his own stupidity that he doesn't realize that nobody really likes him and probably only hangs around him out of apathy, as his parents were most likely the dead couple floating down the stream earlier in the movie.
I believe he's the one who dies and then reappears later somehow.
A poorly edited scene around the 38-minute mark sees an archery victim speared for no reason. Her solution for help is to seek solace in a merry-go-round horsey ride, and then the scene just cuts to the main actors sitting around a campfire. What just happened?
A mermaid goes skinny-dipping in Camp Crystal Lake and encounters Diddle's dead parents floating down stream.
Was the archery scene back at the daytime carnival a reference to 'Friday the 13th?' Is that what you're trying to be, movie?
This Lily chick shows up looking more like lilac than angel white, and again, this buffoon, Diddle, acts the goat and singlehandedly ruins the movie. Hurry up and kill him already.
Boy, what's with the Barry Manilow Club Med music? It's something Bernie would dance to.
You can hear this attention seeker making all the childish voices whenever he speaks. You just know it's him, and nothing he says is funny either. He's the Sonny of 'Grease' or Ralph Malph from whatchamacallit? I could give a thousand other examples, but it's revolting to recall all these pathetic slobs and makes me queasy.
Turning all 'Friday the 13th' again, Lily tells a campfire story in a cemetery about a dog with its throat slit, and this reminds me of that poor hockey player the other day who encountered the same fate on the ice.
A storm shifts in and forces everyone to flee into mother's house from 'Psycho.' This is the scene where the character Diddle goes to the outhouse and perishes. His throat is slit and then he's strung up like a Predator victim, and the movie throws another curve ball in trying to make you believe a racoon is responsible.
Everyone discovers Diddle, then panics and loses their composure, so for some reason, and to build intensity, they play 70s gameshow music like a contestant won the showcase. How this blends with the cemetery horror theme, I have no idea.
These knockoff movies are all inferior to the classics. It just makes you shake your head to see how desperate and pathetic these other directors were in trying to emulate the originals.
Everyone's just been traumatized by seeing Diddle snuffed out; another random severed head pops up unexpectedly, yet they just taxi back to town and don't even bother notifying the authorities and stand around discussing going to the movies in a nonchalant manner.
I can confirm that the movie never bothers returning to the victim with the arrow in her. Don't ask me. (I've read other reviews and apparently I have a heavily edited version. This victim has a bag placed around her head, or something. That wasn't in my copy. Thanks MPAA for looking out for my sensitive eyes.)
See, here it is around the one hour and ten minute mark. The annoying dead guy, Diddle, shows up swinging like Tarzan on a rope over water and still acting the fool again. Didn't he die on the toilet a few chapters ago?
Even some scenes with this Ramona chick don't add up.
She appears half naked in a shower one minute, yet she is being severed in two in another scene that was filmed earlier in the movie in mother's house. I'm confused.
They were chased out of the cemetery midway through the movie, so how does the movie return back there at the end? What I just wrote is confusing as well.
And what's with the choppy editing when the killer is erased? Or better yet, who is the killer?
The body-positive sheriff pulls out his gun, and the shonky editing continues further.
Some fluffy actress asks, "Why did he do this?" And the sinking sheriff says, "I don't know." And that's your ending - he doesn't know. No one does!
I ask, "Hey director, why did you even make this movie?" The director answers, "I don't know."
Be kind and rewind or a fine will incur.
Whoever put their name as editor for this movie needs to be exposed publicly!
Like what's his name said in 'Arlington Road,' we need a name.
Jerry Whittington, if I'm reading right.
His name was Jerry Whittington, His name was Jerry Whittington, His name was Jerry Whittington.
One point for the Lily chick in lilac who got my attention and everybody else's for that matter. I'd like to see some of her other work.
The one aspect of this movie I remember most is one particular character dying in an outhouse but reappearing near the end somehow.
It's like the director edited it all wrong and out of order.
The whole ending is a jumbled mess of confusion.
We're introduced to Sandy, who's cheating on Danny with Ritchie from 'The Wanderers.' I don't know what happened just then, but I believe a passing train impaled them both.
Is the train the killer in this?
Some intro music - what am I watching, 'Dallas' or 'Starsky and Hutch?'
Meanwhile, in Pleasantville, daffy elevator music plays as the cookie-cutter community goes about their daily routine in the suburbs.
The body-positive sheriff is introduced, and it leaves you wondering how he passed his physical to join law enforcement, as I believe it's a requirement to swim laps without sinking like an anvil.
Corny music like in a 'Convoy' barroom brawl scene in a horror movie? Establish yourself already, movie; the start is a mess.
From what I can gather, survivors from 'The Burning' return to their post-traumatic lives, or what's left of them, where a town pervert named Casey acts as the movie's decoy, pretending to be a suspected murderer.
The killer train nearly claimed another life while Casey is in the shadows cheering at the near miss, which only adds to his sinister background and character.
Oh, look! It's Daisy Moses preparing apple pie. What's she doing in this? It is a town full of Georgians, after all, so I guess it makes sense. They are Georgian accents, right?
Is that Lisa from 'Weird Science?'
Creepy Casey does his profile no good by hanging around a children's carousel at a carnival where the height requirement to ride it is no more than 3 feet tall. He does his best to ride for free but is busted and runs off in shame with his pockets full of candy and his cover blown. It's not cool for that pervert to ride it, but the rest of the juvenile cast have no problem with it and ride it like the big kids they are.
Don't you just hate Mongo beefhead characters like this Diddle twit in the movie? There was a Diddle character in most 80s movies, and ten times out of ten, they ruined the experience.
As if all these preppy hotties would hang around him.
Is that Prescilla Presley?
The giant man child, Diddle, suffering from attention-deficient deprivation, wants to be the center of attention in the movie and acts like the class clown by overacting his hand in an attempt to be funny. He's so blinded by his own stupidity that he doesn't realize that nobody really likes him and probably only hangs around him out of apathy, as his parents were most likely the dead couple floating down the stream earlier in the movie.
I believe he's the one who dies and then reappears later somehow.
A poorly edited scene around the 38-minute mark sees an archery victim speared for no reason. Her solution for help is to seek solace in a merry-go-round horsey ride, and then the scene just cuts to the main actors sitting around a campfire. What just happened?
A mermaid goes skinny-dipping in Camp Crystal Lake and encounters Diddle's dead parents floating down stream.
Was the archery scene back at the daytime carnival a reference to 'Friday the 13th?' Is that what you're trying to be, movie?
This Lily chick shows up looking more like lilac than angel white, and again, this buffoon, Diddle, acts the goat and singlehandedly ruins the movie. Hurry up and kill him already.
Boy, what's with the Barry Manilow Club Med music? It's something Bernie would dance to.
You can hear this attention seeker making all the childish voices whenever he speaks. You just know it's him, and nothing he says is funny either. He's the Sonny of 'Grease' or Ralph Malph from whatchamacallit? I could give a thousand other examples, but it's revolting to recall all these pathetic slobs and makes me queasy.
Turning all 'Friday the 13th' again, Lily tells a campfire story in a cemetery about a dog with its throat slit, and this reminds me of that poor hockey player the other day who encountered the same fate on the ice.
A storm shifts in and forces everyone to flee into mother's house from 'Psycho.' This is the scene where the character Diddle goes to the outhouse and perishes. His throat is slit and then he's strung up like a Predator victim, and the movie throws another curve ball in trying to make you believe a racoon is responsible.
Everyone discovers Diddle, then panics and loses their composure, so for some reason, and to build intensity, they play 70s gameshow music like a contestant won the showcase. How this blends with the cemetery horror theme, I have no idea.
These knockoff movies are all inferior to the classics. It just makes you shake your head to see how desperate and pathetic these other directors were in trying to emulate the originals.
Everyone's just been traumatized by seeing Diddle snuffed out; another random severed head pops up unexpectedly, yet they just taxi back to town and don't even bother notifying the authorities and stand around discussing going to the movies in a nonchalant manner.
I can confirm that the movie never bothers returning to the victim with the arrow in her. Don't ask me. (I've read other reviews and apparently I have a heavily edited version. This victim has a bag placed around her head, or something. That wasn't in my copy. Thanks MPAA for looking out for my sensitive eyes.)
See, here it is around the one hour and ten minute mark. The annoying dead guy, Diddle, shows up swinging like Tarzan on a rope over water and still acting the fool again. Didn't he die on the toilet a few chapters ago?
Even some scenes with this Ramona chick don't add up.
She appears half naked in a shower one minute, yet she is being severed in two in another scene that was filmed earlier in the movie in mother's house. I'm confused.
They were chased out of the cemetery midway through the movie, so how does the movie return back there at the end? What I just wrote is confusing as well.
And what's with the choppy editing when the killer is erased? Or better yet, who is the killer?
The body-positive sheriff pulls out his gun, and the shonky editing continues further.
Some fluffy actress asks, "Why did he do this?" And the sinking sheriff says, "I don't know." And that's your ending - he doesn't know. No one does!
I ask, "Hey director, why did you even make this movie?" The director answers, "I don't know."
Be kind and rewind or a fine will incur.
Whoever put their name as editor for this movie needs to be exposed publicly!
Like what's his name said in 'Arlington Road,' we need a name.
Jerry Whittington, if I'm reading right.
His name was Jerry Whittington, His name was Jerry Whittington, His name was Jerry Whittington.
One point for the Lily chick in lilac who got my attention and everybody else's for that matter. I'd like to see some of her other work.