Review of Cyborg

Cyborg (1989)
2/10
Badly-Acted Low-Budget Schlock
13 May 2024
Where to begin? The acting is terrible. The villain Fender grunts and postures like a pro wrestler might if he was chained to a post in the Thunderdome. The special effects (e.g., matte paintings) are worse than a cheap TV-Movie. The martial-arts sound-effects (THWIP! WHACK!) sound really fake. Some throwaway henchman lines are clearly dubbed -- the lip-sync is clearly wrong.

There is JUST enough "cyborg" content to explain the title -- but it's stupid/unnecessary/pretentious and clearly just a marketing gimmick.

There are plenty of logic fails too. JCVD manages to make his trail easy to follow when on the run (by not bothering to replace a manhole cover). Later, he throws away the advantage of surprise -- when greatly outnumbered -- in order to stand tall (and show off his pecs). I probably lost some IQ points watching this.

Albert Pyun, who has a bad rep as a movie director, apparently thought he was doing a good job -- the movie is quite pretentious; the corny line the cyborg says to/about JCVD at the end is almost barf-worthy (probably a "howler" for a suitably rowdy group of viewers).

I give this three stars, minus a half-star for killing off the ONLY character I (kind of) liked, and another for doing it in a badly clichéd way. That's two (2) stars total. A Roger Corman film would have been a step up.
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