Animaniacs: Wakko's Wish (1999 Video)
Paxton Whitehead: King Salazar
Quotes
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King Salazar : You horrible children! Who taught you how to behave?
Wakko Warner : [sadly] No one, sir.
Dot Warner : You see - cough! Cough! We're orphans.
King Salazar : Yes, well, everyone has problems.
Yakko Warner : [Bambi eyes] You know, we'd SO like to be adopted.
Wakko Warner : Will you be our new daddy?
King Salazar : Certainly not!
Dot Warner : [jumps on him] Buy me a toy, daddy! Buy me a toy, buy me a toy, buy me a toy!
Wakko Warner : Oh, please Dad! Do!
King Salazar : I'm not your father!
Yakko Warner : That's not what Mommy said.
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King Salazar : I know - I'll wish for a million bucks. No! Make that two million bucks!
Yakko Warner : Sounds good to me.
[Salazar is suddenly trampled by a herd of male deer]
Yakko Warner : Just be glad it's not mating season.
[One of the deer makes a romantic face at Salazar]
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King Salazar : When will this insanity stop?
Dot Warner , Yakko Warner , Wakko Warner : I know! Pick me! Pick me! I know!
King Salazar : Yes, you.
Dot Warner : Daaaaah... what was the question?
Yakko Warner , Wakko Warner : Good Answer! All right!
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King Salazar : [talking about King Salazar's wishes] How about fame and fortune?
Yakko Warner : Here's Fame with Irene Cara and a subscription to Fortune Magazine!
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King Salazar : How about the Midas touch? Everything I touch will turn to gold.
Yakko Warner : Yeah, including food. Try eating a solid gold turkey. Adios bicuspids!
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King Salazar : [talking about wishes] How about eternal youth? That I could be sixteen forever?
Dot Warner : Yeah and you'd live that same year over and over and you'd have zits and no one would ever date you!
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Yakko Warner : Oh, riiiight! The secrets about the wishing star- right! Yeah. You see, the key to the whole thing is... Uh, you got a little something in your nose.
King Salazar : Huh? Where?
Yakko Warner : Right there.
King Salazar : [sniffs] Did I get it?
Yakko Warner : Yeah - noooo, no, still there.
King Salazar : [sniffs again] How about now?
Yakko Warner : Now it's over there. Ooh.
King Salazar : [wipes] How about now?
Yakko Warner : No. Ugh.
Dot Warner , Wakko Warner : Ewww! Get it! Get it! Get it!
Yakko Warner : Please! Could you go to the bathroom and take care of it? Oof. I mean, whoops!
[gags]
King Salazar : Oh, all right!
[Goes into the bathroom. Wakko jumps down and locks the door]
Yakko Warner , Dot Warner , Wakko Warner : [dancing] We're in charge! We're in charge!
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King Salazar : Your job, Baron, is to stop those villagers from getting to the star, by any means necessary.
Baron Thaddeus von Plotz III , Ralph the Guard : Yes, sir!
King Salazar : Oh, and those three kids, Yakko, Wakko and Dot.
Baron Thaddeus von Plotz III : Y-yes, sir?
King Salazar : I don't want them showing up at the wishing star.
Baron Thaddeus von Plotz III : I'll slow them down, sir.
King Salazar : You're not catching my drift.
Baron Thaddeus von Plotz III : Well, I'll try to steer them off course.
King Salazar : I don't want to see them again... alive.
Baron Thaddeus von Plotz III : But they're just kids. How much trouble can they be?
King Salazar : You have no idea. So don't think of them as kids, Baron. Think of them as the dearly departed, or you'll be likewise!