Bottom of the barrell slasher, with a derivative plot (an insane serial killer evades from a prison bus and return to his house where he started his massacres ten years before, but a few teenagers are there camping. You may imagine the rest of the story), most of the killing happening outside of the camera (so, where is the fun? And there is a total lack of invention even in the various deaths depicted here), without a single nude scene (and what is a teen slasher without at least a couple of tits? Be serious...) and with a debatable acting at best. Even the killer is a delusion. Better to stay away from this one
6 Reviews
His bite is much worse than his bark.
BA_Harrison22 May 2021
Witness to a violent shootout between drug-dealers, pizza delivery boy Alden (Liam Cundill) decides to lay low for a while by joining his friends Brian (Terence Reis) and Vickie (Michelle Constant) on a country break at an old mansion. When they arrive there they are disappointed to find that the property is dilapidated, and that it has also been rented out to a group of tourists. Deciding to make the most of a bad situation, the occupants set about trying to have fun in the manky mansion, unaware that the place was once home to serial killer The Family Man, who has just escaped and is heading their way.
Somewhere in Return of the Family Man there's a decent slasher movie trying to get out: the film has a classic set up, a seriously sick killer (who butchered his own family for the insurance money), and a high body count. The problem is that the film doesn't take itself seriously enough to be scary, with comical characters who are always larking about, while most of the deaths occur off-screen, resulting in a frustratingly low gore quotient. Also, despite the potential victims including a tarty blonde, tour-guide Libby (Debra Kaye), and a hot French girl, Sylvie (Dominique Moser), there's no gratuitous sex scene, no skinny dipping scene, and no shower scene!
Writer/director John Murlowski does manage a few effectively unsettling moments that hint at what might've been had he gone down a more serious route: the slaughter of an entire family is amazingly mean-spirited, the discovery of a roomful of corpses is wonderfully macabre, and some of the kills are quite nasty in spirit (face on a food blender blade, lump hammer to the head)- if only Murlowski hadn't shied away from showing us the splatter.
Shot in South Africa, masquerading as the U. S. A., with Adrian Galley doing a really terrible English accent as blonde-haired punk Weasel.
Somewhere in Return of the Family Man there's a decent slasher movie trying to get out: the film has a classic set up, a seriously sick killer (who butchered his own family for the insurance money), and a high body count. The problem is that the film doesn't take itself seriously enough to be scary, with comical characters who are always larking about, while most of the deaths occur off-screen, resulting in a frustratingly low gore quotient. Also, despite the potential victims including a tarty blonde, tour-guide Libby (Debra Kaye), and a hot French girl, Sylvie (Dominique Moser), there's no gratuitous sex scene, no skinny dipping scene, and no shower scene!
Writer/director John Murlowski does manage a few effectively unsettling moments that hint at what might've been had he gone down a more serious route: the slaughter of an entire family is amazingly mean-spirited, the discovery of a roomful of corpses is wonderfully macabre, and some of the kills are quite nasty in spirit (face on a food blender blade, lump hammer to the head)- if only Murlowski hadn't shied away from showing us the splatter.
Shot in South Africa, masquerading as the U. S. A., with Adrian Galley doing a really terrible English accent as blonde-haired punk Weasel.
Fun but forgettable
acidburn-1022 May 2013
I remember watching this movie when I was a kid and thought that it was quite fun at the time and recently I viewed it again and I thought it was still fun and a couple of scenes stuck out in my mind, but this isn't as bad as some of the other slashers that came out during this period. The acting is pretty bad, but there are some decent scenes and plenty of kills and some comedy moments.
But unfortunately the final half hour is incredibly stupid, even by 80's slasher movie standards, the remaining characters are well aware that there is a killer on the loose, but they continue to stick around and even wonder off on their own and surprise, surprise they get killed. But I did like the fact that they group together and build weapons to try and get the killer, I thought that this was an interesting plot point, even though it was very cheesy and predictably they mostly fail and get bumped off until the last remaining few get the better off him.
Okay this movie is very cheap looking, but it never drags and it does rather move along very quickly and even though the acting was pretty bad, the characters were pretty likable and even the family man killer was hilariously camp and this movie does keep you interested all the way through.
But unfortunately the final half hour is incredibly stupid, even by 80's slasher movie standards, the remaining characters are well aware that there is a killer on the loose, but they continue to stick around and even wonder off on their own and surprise, surprise they get killed. But I did like the fact that they group together and build weapons to try and get the killer, I thought that this was an interesting plot point, even though it was very cheesy and predictably they mostly fail and get bumped off until the last remaining few get the better off him.
Okay this movie is very cheap looking, but it never drags and it does rather move along very quickly and even though the acting was pretty bad, the characters were pretty likable and even the family man killer was hilariously camp and this movie does keep you interested all the way through.
Horribly cheap and idiotic slasher flick.
HumanoidOfFlesh24 March 2008
A group of obnoxious teens rents a ruined house,which once belonged to the infamous serial killer called The Family Man.They quickly become victims of this crazed slasher."Return of the Family Man" is extremely cheap and extremely stupid.The acting is diabolical,the gore is absent as is the nudity and the killer is laughable throwing painfully dumb one-liners.I have seen literally tons of 80's slasher flicks and this one is easily among the worst.Even the killings are particularly anemic and bloodless.The film is very obscure and only recommended for fans of cheesy trash cinema.All others should stay away from this steaming pile of junk.2 out of 10.
Flush When You're Done! Abysmal
saint_brett21 February 2024
Warning: Spoilers
Return of the family man? Well, where's he been all this time?
Left his wife and kids for another woman, did he?
What looks like Mike D delivers a pizza in an oversized box big enough for five Andre the Giants.
Ow la la, Rosina is introduced, and I'll have a slice of her. Too late, she gets caught up in the crossfire of drug lord feuding, and Mike D takes shelter under the pizza box. Yeah, I guess it's so thick that it probably would be bulletproof. It's not Mike D; he's just a Randy Bodeck loverboy on the run from a Triad crime scene.
Billy Idol is then introduced with a partial Contiki tour in tow, and they all appear to be heading out to some manor out in the middle of nowhere.
Elsewhere, a bunch of monks are being transferred from point A to point B, and here we meet The Family Man. He becomes Dr. Kimble and fugitives his way out of custody in the same manner that Michael Myers escapes most times. If you want your highly dangerous movie villain to escape, just transfer him.
I can detect European accents in most of these actors. They're masking their British accents with American ones.
This guy thinks he's Johnny Cage.
I bet this garbage was filmed in Belgium or something.
They're horrible European actors with garbage accents, and they've even employed that bare-fisted fighting nazi from 'Raiders of the Lost Ark' to play the sheriff in this.
It follows the typical European format, too, with a bunch of teens meeting up at an empty cottage and acting like they're top 40 countdown material with smartass attitudes. It's got Italian written all over it.
"Why don't you just take it out of here," said the British actor, attempting a Yankee accent.
This movie is trying to define the United States with a honkytonk bar and chickens frequenting a Quickie-Mart like it's Florida and throw in a bit of baseball, and that's their take on the states.
At least some of the accents in 'Slaughter High' were convincing.
Even the score they're using sounds like it's promoting leather products from Tuscany or sparkling mineral water.
Wow, a soccer ball? That's not American.
Marshmallows by a campfire and a coyote howling out in the distance? Why not reference hotdogs, old glory, or Budweiser while you're at it?
The horrible Euro backpackers conveniently choose the manor where The Family Man used to live, and what a small world! He's already on his way there, too.
This isn't even interesting. In fact, it's downright humiliating.
There's not one likeable cast member.
I'm going to consult Google to confirm where this was filmed, 'cause it sure as hell ain't the States. Heavens to Murgatroyd, South Africa! Where's that, down near Adelaide? Yuck. I was way off the mark, but I knew something was fishy.
So, why are they portraying their home country as America?
Were they embarrassed by their origins? Or were they too proud to promote the culture of their own country?
This is as phony as 'Cold Mountain' being filmed in Yugoslavia somewhere.
Wow, did you steal this corpse scene from 'Friday the 13th 2?' They discover all these corpses in the basement, and none of them think to leave immediately and walk to town, yet they just stay in the house and wait to be picked off.
The blond bimbo just had her face blended off, and still they all just stand around and loiter in the house with the killer at large.
After he gets burned, he sort of resembles the purple Haahoo from 'In the Night Garden.'
Billy Idol saves the day at the end, and can someone explain to me the laws of physics as I wasn't paying attention in science class?
Take this propane scene here, for instance.
It rolls down a steep hill horizontally at speed yet manages to decelerate and turn vertical somehow just to fit in that tiny well in the ground.
And what's with the misleading movie cover depicting a burglar ogling a lady through blinds like it's a gritty inner-city drama?
One point for the Rosina chick who was only in it for no more than two minutes.
Left his wife and kids for another woman, did he?
What looks like Mike D delivers a pizza in an oversized box big enough for five Andre the Giants.
Ow la la, Rosina is introduced, and I'll have a slice of her. Too late, she gets caught up in the crossfire of drug lord feuding, and Mike D takes shelter under the pizza box. Yeah, I guess it's so thick that it probably would be bulletproof. It's not Mike D; he's just a Randy Bodeck loverboy on the run from a Triad crime scene.
Billy Idol is then introduced with a partial Contiki tour in tow, and they all appear to be heading out to some manor out in the middle of nowhere.
Elsewhere, a bunch of monks are being transferred from point A to point B, and here we meet The Family Man. He becomes Dr. Kimble and fugitives his way out of custody in the same manner that Michael Myers escapes most times. If you want your highly dangerous movie villain to escape, just transfer him.
I can detect European accents in most of these actors. They're masking their British accents with American ones.
This guy thinks he's Johnny Cage.
I bet this garbage was filmed in Belgium or something.
They're horrible European actors with garbage accents, and they've even employed that bare-fisted fighting nazi from 'Raiders of the Lost Ark' to play the sheriff in this.
It follows the typical European format, too, with a bunch of teens meeting up at an empty cottage and acting like they're top 40 countdown material with smartass attitudes. It's got Italian written all over it.
"Why don't you just take it out of here," said the British actor, attempting a Yankee accent.
This movie is trying to define the United States with a honkytonk bar and chickens frequenting a Quickie-Mart like it's Florida and throw in a bit of baseball, and that's their take on the states.
At least some of the accents in 'Slaughter High' were convincing.
Even the score they're using sounds like it's promoting leather products from Tuscany or sparkling mineral water.
Wow, a soccer ball? That's not American.
Marshmallows by a campfire and a coyote howling out in the distance? Why not reference hotdogs, old glory, or Budweiser while you're at it?
The horrible Euro backpackers conveniently choose the manor where The Family Man used to live, and what a small world! He's already on his way there, too.
This isn't even interesting. In fact, it's downright humiliating.
There's not one likeable cast member.
I'm going to consult Google to confirm where this was filmed, 'cause it sure as hell ain't the States. Heavens to Murgatroyd, South Africa! Where's that, down near Adelaide? Yuck. I was way off the mark, but I knew something was fishy.
So, why are they portraying their home country as America?
Were they embarrassed by their origins? Or were they too proud to promote the culture of their own country?
This is as phony as 'Cold Mountain' being filmed in Yugoslavia somewhere.
Wow, did you steal this corpse scene from 'Friday the 13th 2?' They discover all these corpses in the basement, and none of them think to leave immediately and walk to town, yet they just stay in the house and wait to be picked off.
The blond bimbo just had her face blended off, and still they all just stand around and loiter in the house with the killer at large.
After he gets burned, he sort of resembles the purple Haahoo from 'In the Night Garden.'
Billy Idol saves the day at the end, and can someone explain to me the laws of physics as I wasn't paying attention in science class?
Take this propane scene here, for instance.
It rolls down a steep hill horizontally at speed yet manages to decelerate and turn vertical somehow just to fit in that tiny well in the ground.
And what's with the misleading movie cover depicting a burglar ogling a lady through blinds like it's a gritty inner-city drama?
One point for the Rosina chick who was only in it for no more than two minutes.
Lousy horror movie from South Africa
lor_24 May 2023
My review was written in July 1990 after watching the movie on Raedon video cassette.
The stepfather genre goes to South Africa in this slasher video, released direct to video Stateside.
Ron Smerczak plays a mass murderer, called Family Man by the press, who keeps killing off families that remind him of his own family (which he killed in the first place). He escapes from a prison bus at the beginning of the film and gorily kills all his fellow prisoners for good measure.
Picture awkwardly injects a teens-in-jeopardy subplot that dominates the proceedings: answering an ad, youngsters congregate at Family Man's remote mansion and, sure enough, he's headed there too.
Supposedly set in the "Pacific Southwest", South African-lensed opus has plenty of gaffes, notably an all-American character saying "I'll throw the lot of you out". Accents vary as well. Cast includes Shirley Jane Harris, previously seen in another Cape Town horror pic "The Stay Awake".
The stepfather genre goes to South Africa in this slasher video, released direct to video Stateside.
Ron Smerczak plays a mass murderer, called Family Man by the press, who keeps killing off families that remind him of his own family (which he killed in the first place). He escapes from a prison bus at the beginning of the film and gorily kills all his fellow prisoners for good measure.
Picture awkwardly injects a teens-in-jeopardy subplot that dominates the proceedings: answering an ad, youngsters congregate at Family Man's remote mansion and, sure enough, he's headed there too.
Supposedly set in the "Pacific Southwest", South African-lensed opus has plenty of gaffes, notably an all-American character saying "I'll throw the lot of you out". Accents vary as well. Cast includes Shirley Jane Harris, previously seen in another Cape Town horror pic "The Stay Awake".
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