I Killed My Mother (2009) Poster

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7/10
This is a first movie? One thumb up!
FrenchEddieFelson27 June 2019
J'ai tué ma mère (2009) is the first film of Xavier Dolan realized a decade ago. I lately discovered it in order to complete the filmography of this brilliant Quebec director. This film focuses on the stormy and tempestuous relationship between a son and his mother, and turns out to be an autofiction, the autobiographical part remaining undisclosed, as in any secret garden.

We distinctively perceive the characteristic atmosphere of Xavier Dolan's filmography: as an excellent habit, this dark and sensual film is based on a hyper sensitivity and a keen sense of photography. Usually, most of the characters are on edge or even disturbed. In this movie, Hubert Minel is the only one. As if, in this partially autobiographical work, Xavier Dolan wanted to assume alone the chaos emanating from this extreme mother-son relationship. In this respect, it's quite successful: he is indeed sometimes an assh*le and deeply disrespectful with his mum and one almost wants to slap him. An elegant way to publicly and solemnly ask for the forgiveness of his tender mother.

As actors, Anne Dorval, Xavier Dolan and Suzanne Clément are truly excellent. As a director, Xavier Dolan offers us a high-quality first film.
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8/10
Loved it
erin_osullivan27 June 2011
I just finished watching this film online with poorly translated subtitles which made it difficult to decipher what the characters were saying some of the time, however I got the gist of what was going on.

A few of the reviews I've read have said they couldn't stand the main character and it dragged the film down. I think this film works because the main character is so bratty! He is absolutely wretched to his mother at some points and his mother perfectly nice back to him. One reviewer said they couldn't understand why he was so mean to his mother 'for no reason'. I actually related to Hubert's character getting annoyed at little things because when you're a teenager everything about your parent can annoy you! The first scene is stellar with the mother having cream cheese on her face and it annoying Hubert.

I also believe that him being a 'closeted' gay and wanting freedom from his mother would also have been contributing factors as to why he was such a brat to his mother. The constant struggle between wanting to be independent of your parents but also not being quite old enough to be completely alone and still depending on a parent is what is captured so well in this film. I like that you can see the angst between mother and son from the child's eyes, frustrated yet loving. Hubert is a tortured soul! Everything is a little exaggerated, but wasn't every little problem a big deal when you were 16?

This film was great in my eyes. I got a lot of entertainment from it and it's an amazing effort for the first directorial. It is definitely stylised and borrows from the likes of Wong Kar Wai (violins??) but it suits the film and contemporary setting and interests of young adults today.
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7/10
Mommy Dearest
rpvanderlinden18 January 2011
"J'ai tue ma mere" seems a little rough around the edges and Xavier Dolan doesn't frame his shots so that they're picture perfect, but it seemed to suit the story. More to the point, what was happening inside the frame was much too interesting, and often moving, and I watched the movie in its entirety from beginning to end.

"J'ai tue ma mere" is the story of a gay teenager and his mother in a single-parent household. Man, do I know that territory well! I don't like the word "dysfunctional" - it's coined psycho-babble. The household depicted here is about as real as I've ever seen in a film. It functions as well as it can given the tight quarters mother and son share. They're continually sparring. Hubert, wary, entirely self-centred and quite the drama queen, goes on rants and tries to push his mother's buttons and test her love, but when he needs a favour, it's back to calling her "mommy". I loved her philosophical stoicism, an attitude she developed, I would guess, to protect herself from hurt, and I was touched by Hubert's back-pedalling when he thinks he's gone too far. Both sweet and raw, this is is a relationship of love. I smiled during the scene when mom brings up his homosexuality and he's caught off-guard. Actually, I smiled for a number of reasons, one of which was because, for once, Hubert was speechless.

The film is open-ended, the way life is, and the way the young view life, far-reaching and full of possibilities. It's a lovely film - warm, frank and not without a little self-deprecating humour and genuine wit (the shot of the Virgin Mary, within a specific context). I was left with the feeling that this was a chapter in a life, a relationship, and I felt optimistic. Perhaps, one day, Xavier Dolan will continue the story on film. I look forward to it.
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10/10
An achievement that can't be ignored
pascalpelletier1112 December 2009
With his first feature, Montrealer Xavier Dolan has delivered what is already one of the most talked-about directorial debuts of 2009. In a triple-threat feat, Dolan writes, directs and stars in J'ai tué ma mère, the semi-autobiographical tale of a young gay man coming of age while struggling with his tortured relationship with his mother.

Their fights escalate until mom hatches a toxic plan: Hubert will be shipped off to boarding school. He is aghast but has little choice, as mom has managed to convince her ex-husband that a change of scenery is in the lad's best interests. Being banished to a mother-free zone might have seemed a good option for Hubert, but the move simply leads to an ultimate standoff between them. Dolan and Dorval navigate their way through the harried, increasingly vicious tête-à-têtes with delicacy, evoking sympathy for both characters.

Dolan's enthusiasm for cinema can be felt throughout J'ai tué ma mère. Combining assured writing, a confident directorial style (the scene where Hubert makes love to his boyfriend is a standout) and a beautifully rendered performance, Dolan's arrival on the big screen is an achievement that can't be ignored.
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10/10
Cinema is great, indeed...
reb_vodka_04209921 November 2009
Oh, I wish there were words capable enough to describe this film - to describe how it made me feel. But maybe there aren't. So, we'll make do with those we have.

I saw this movie at the 50th International Film Festival of Thessaloniki - a festival I've been going to for about 8 years, give-or-take. And this is the best movie I've seen in all those years, through all those movies. It's so intense it rips you apart, full of the most sublime poetry, simplicity raging and screaming. The direction is so meticulously studied - nothing left to chance - every single take and scene offering gravity to the characters. Even now, that I see the poster of the film, it's so brilliant is ridiculous how much. It has this sad-looking child on it, when in the film, we only see a child for seconds, and it is a happy-looking child in those seconds.

After the second half I was constantly crying. I can bet that I'm from the few people who have cried in this film - if not the only one. Because there really isn't something in it that can prompt tears. But it is one of the most intense, most human, most real films I've watched in my life. I wanted to explode, to stand up and shout. I kept switching positions in my seat, I shook my head and laughed and wanted it to end because I couldn't take anymore. And when it was over, I wanted to watch it again.

It's so far my favorite movie of this year. No, scratch that. It's my favorite movie of the last few years. If not my favorite movie amongst the few I hold so dear.

I wish Xavier Dolan can be funded to create more, more, more films in the future. Even though, I already think he has created his chef-d'oeuvre.
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admirable
Kirpianuscus16 May 2021
Maybe, the realism represents the main virtue of this real great film. A film about a love haunting many of us. About an unique age and about, with admirable high honesty, a relation confuse, always, in its essence. For me is simple - J'ai tué ma mère represents just a simple and convincing proof about the genius of Xavier Dolan. Because it is more than a powerful artistic fim. It represents a sort of confession, more of viewer than the director. A sort of large mirror reflection. Short, just great.
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7/10
'Maman:' can't live with her, can't live without her
Chris Knipp13 March 2010
Warning: Spoilers
In this debut feature film in Canadian French, Hubert (Xavier Dolan, who wrote, directed, produced and stars) is a gay Montreal teenager who, as the title 'J'ai tué ma mère' hyperbolically informs us, is not the least bit fond of his female parent. The male one lives in another part of town and is seen only briefly, and later. Hubert doesn't actually resort to violence against Chantale (Anne Dorval), as might have happened in an early Ozon film; he's just verbally cruel to her; unfortunately for the emotional dimension of the piece, she's never very deeply stung by his many barbs, though she can return critical salvos aplenty when called upon. And so the mutual abuse goes on and on and on, chiefly at the dinner table, where she often serves him his favorite foods, or in the car, where she chauffeurs him to and from school.

There is a car scene in Cédric Klapisch's 'L'Auberge espagnole,' where Romain Duris explodes with a nasty epithet, cutting off a tiresome speech by his overly understanding old hippie mom (Martine Demaret). Just one explosion. That's all it takes to show all a son's pent-up annoyance at his well-meaning but burdensome mother. What makes it so effective is that it's so unexpected. Duris' character, who happens to be called Xavier, is always the good and polite and dutiful young man. Dolan is not so efficient by a long sight. Hubert and his mother have an ongoing verbal battle that never goes anywhere, and the louder they yell at each other, the less it matters to us. What we can say is that Dolan gives his mother a voice. She looms very large in the story. Hubert really, really wants to get away from her even though he kind of loves her. The difference between him and Klapisch's Xavier is that Xavier is ready to go out on his own, and Hubert isn't: he needs his mom terribly -- there's the rub. He has to have her around to define himself by vociferously enunciating the way he despises everything about her. The truth is she's not at all a bad mom; she's just a sounding board for Hubert's teen angst.

Chantale isn't developed in great depth, but even less developed is Hubert's boyfriend, a schoolmate called Antonin (François Arnaud) -- an adolescent homage to Antonin Artaud (there's one to Arthur Rimbaud too). Yes, the two boys kiss a bit, and get naked together after an embarrassingly filmed scene in which they splash-paint Antonin's mom's office space à la Jackson Pollack and, of course, get paint all over each other. Antonin's liberal mom Hèlene (Patricia Tulasne), cool with the boys' gayness, provides a contrast to Chantale, and is also inadvertently the way Chantale finds out her son likes boys.

Hubert's insolence eventually leads to a meeting between his mom and dad (Pierre Chagnon) and a decision to send the boy off to a boarding school. At this point things get rather confusing. Very quickly Hubert is at the school, with a new, naughty dope-smoking boyfriend -- but then he's back home again pouring out his love to Chantale while on speed, and then he's apparently run away from the school. The headmaster calls Chantale to tell her, and implies, to her intense annoyance, that it's all her fault. The sequence is too fast all of a sudden. There is also a relationship with one of Hubert's earlier teachers, Julie (Suzanne Clement), that is a bit over-the-top, and badly defined considering Hubert's consciously gay. And that fact, given all the yelling between mother and son and the latter's outspokenness, is something you'd think would have come out earlier; presumably he finds her too clueless to tell. The chronological uncertainties and unclear motivations are various. And yet, due to the universality of filial conflicts and the vivacity of the proceedings, 'I Killed My Mother' has crowd-pleasing potential.

It would be a bit churlish to damn this first feature for its unoriginal storyline and annoying mother-son shout-fests and other faults. There's a modicum of life in every scene of 'I Killed My Mother,' and, considering the source, it's precocious and brave. Xavier Dolan was nineteen or so when he made it and seventeen when he wrote the screenplay. Let's cut the kid some slack. If he keeps at it, this could be like the autobiographical first novel so many writers throw away; and in future as his maturity grows, Dolan may repudiate this youthful effort. It just happens that the Montreal film industry and Dolon's supporters, maybe because he's gay and poutily cute, because he's been in pictures and ads since he was a kid and he's got connections, or because he's got chutzpah, it got made into a movie, with Red One images digitally transferred to 35mm. With alternating bright color scheme for the boyfriend's liberal household and a dull one for home; self-indulgent black-and-white monologues supposedly shot in the bathroom with a cheap video camera that look much too handsome for that, and some color exteriors that are also handsome, if derivative, the film has a look, or looks, that go beyond the ordinary, even if they don't quite jell. There are borrowings from Truffaut, Wong Kar-wai, and lots of others that herald a giddy love of movies. Dolan is good at playing himself (not everybody is), and the camera likes him. If he continues to make movies -- and with the encouragement he's gotten, which includes several awards at Cannes, he's unlikely not to -- Xavier Dolan may turn into a good filmmaker.

'J'ai tué ma mère' was chosen to be part of the New Directors/New Films series of the Film Society of Lincoln Center and the Museum of Modern Art, New York, and screened in early April at the Walter Reade Theater and MoMA.
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9/10
Clever, innovative and honest
lisa-ravenclaw25 April 2012
She: like most mothers she cares for her son and looks after him. She drives him to school, she washes his clothes, she cooks.

The downside: She uses these things as excuses to constantly make him feel guilty, make him feel like he owes her for loving him. She keeps accusing him of being ungrateful (though she never says it directly, but implies it in almost every conversation).

What's (arguably) worse: she refuses to listen to him. When she does listen, she doesn't take him seriously. She avoids confrontation, barring occasional hysterical outbursts.

He: makes it perfectly clear that he doesn't expect her to do all the material things for him that she does, and that he'd much rather fend for himself if that means not having to be made to feel guilty all the time.

She: is a struggling single mother, working each day to try to give him a better future. She has to face self-important people who judge her, but who have no idea about the kind of life she leads.

He: does not understand this. He does not see past her awful taste (in clothes and interior design). He thinks she's superficial. He refuses to let her be a part of his life, he criticizes her every word, her every move. He screams at her, insults her.

She: loves him.

He: loves her too. So much.

J'ai tue ma mere is an unflinchingly honest, masterfully shot portrayal of a strained mother/son relationship. Great actors, beautiful images and, I cannot emphasize this enough, absolutely spectacular technique.

Bravo Xavier Dolan! You have created a true work of art.
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6/10
Annoying character
To_au8410 May 2017
I have never disliked a character more than I disliked Hubert. Whiny, self-righteous, disrespectful brat. His self entitlement overtakes the majority of the movie and I just mentally switched off. I just wanted to give him a smack for the whole movie.

Anne Dorval did a brilliant job as the mother.
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10/10
Well-acted and devastatingly emotional
Blondmonkey53 October 2009
Review: I Killed My Mother/J'ai tué ma mère 9*/10

Largely autobiographical, the film details the intensely volatile relationship between a gay 16-year-old, Hubert (Dolan), and his mother, Chantale (Anne Dorval). The film builds through a series of richly hysterical conflicts that find these two characters exceedingly incapable of living with or without one another. Perhaps a viciously honest love story more than anything else, I Killed My Mother gives us an acute and compassionate portrayal of both sides of this complex human interaction.

Dolan stars as a Montreal teen whose relationship with his mother redefines "troubled" — the young hyphenate a natural in front of the camera and a little over-excited behind it.

Seen at the Toronto International Film Festival.
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7/10
A grounded and personal story told on a small scale but never lacking passion and honesty.
shabanavdulaj9 August 2020
Anyway, I think it's a bit overrated, people talking about this film and making it sound like it's something so special. I think that a lot of people are blown away by the fact that Dolan made this film when he was barely out of his teens. And yes that's a big deal, but if we are judging the film not knowing who was behind it, I think that the impact wouldn't have been the same.
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10/10
Stark reminiscence of a teen's painful coming out
larry-41122 September 2009
I attended a screening of "J'ai Tué Ma Mère" at the 2009 Toronto International Film Festival. Based on his own childhood and adolescence in Québec, Xavier Dolan's film probes the relationship between mother and child when the son's sexuality is in question. Awkward early relationships are difficult for any teen, let alone one burdened with his own fears and mother's unwillingness to accept his "difference." Arguments and fight scenes between Dolan and his mom (the stunning Anne Dorval) are painful to watch, but tender love scenes with François Arnaud provide a stark and welcome contrast.

The film is filled with anger, sadness, love, hate, and humor -- lots of it. It's a winner and received a standing ovation here. And some inspiration for budding filmmakers: Dolan wrote, directed, produced, and starred in J'ai Tué Ma Mère at the age of 19.
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7/10
Evidence of a fledgling auteur
gizmomogwai17 August 2016
Just saw Mommy (2014) this week, and what a revelation! Great Canadian film by Montreal filmmaker Xavier Dolan, who was only 25 when he made at, and his since gone on to win the Cannes Grand Prix. My expectations weren't high since the only other film I had seen of his was Laurence Anyways, which was really, really long, and felt longer. A number of critics commented how Mommy was I Killed My Mother inverted, told from the perspective of the mother, so I was curious to check it out. Canada also submitted I Killed My Mother for the Foreign Language Oscar.

A number of critics had commented Mommy showed Dolan had matured as a director, and I could understand why after seeing I Killed My Mother. It's OK, but it's not great filmmaking or particularly mature. The protagonist- played by Dolan himself- often struck me as a whining brat. There's often conflict between moms and sons, but whether it's significant enough to be a great film is another story- she's not the worst mom ever. One thing that did impress me was how different Anne Dorval is as the mother in both films- Dolan said he deliberately cast her as opposites, and he wasn't kidding! Shows she's a great actress, and it makes me wonder which character is closer to the real her.

Unfortunately, despite its Grand Prix, It's Only the End of the World got panned, but Dolan's still young and likely has a future ahead of him.
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5/10
Disappointing
KrisNederland17 March 2010
Warning: Spoilers
I went to see 'J'ai tué ma mère'last Sunday. I don't quite know what I don't like about it, but I don't. It looked very beautiful and there are some interesting characters in it, but somehow I just never felt connected to them. There's a lot of verbal fighting between mother and son and I didn't have sympathy for either of them, they're both so egocentric! All they seem to do is repeat the same fight over and over again without listening to one another, tiresome! I really enjoyed the way the interior of the house and the clothes of the mother and son looked though. It depicted their character very well! And the music is absolutely stunning, I have to get the soundtrack.
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10/10
I Killed My Mother
cultfilmfan8 April 2010
I Killed My Mother is a Canadian film in French with English subtitles. The film focuses on the relationship between a 16 year old named Hubert and his mother Chantale. To say that they do not always get along is an understatement. Yet with all the verbal abuse between one another and the tension, they do still love each other and may soon realize that perhaps they can not live without one another. Chantale was not ready to become a mother and in a lot of ways, still is not, even though her son Hubert is now 16. We see Chantale as ego centric sometimes, but mainly just in her own world and the concerns of Hubert are not always hers and when he tells her something, she soon forgets and in a lot of ways she can have temper tantrums and be just as immature as a child at times when things are not going her way. Hubert is a teenager, which anyone can tell you is one of the most complex and stressful parts of one's life and growing up. Hubert is starting to find love and creativity in what he does, but he often feels that Chantale does not appreciate him, let him have his own space, or even acknowledge that he is there a lot of the time and his feelings, needs and concerns mean little to her, or if they have any significance, she soon forgets them. Hubert is coming to a point in his life where he is hiding quite a bit from his mother and perhaps if they were closer this would not be the case, but it makes it all the more difficult for him. One thing that I really liked about the film was that it does not place blame for the poor state of the relationship solely on Chantale and neither does it place all the responsibility, or fault on Hubert. Like any family that is going to work, or be somewhat functional, it takes the efforts and input from everyone involved to make it work, not just one individual alone. The film is told from Hubert's perspective and even he admits that there are things he still loves about his mother and we can see from her body language and the way she acts that deep down she still really cares for him and perhaps the problem is that she has too much other stuff on her mind. The character development and just the handling of the story is fantastically done. It takes a subject most of us would have some insight on in one way or another and gives us different ways of looking at it. At times what we are watching is very unsettling and hard to watch at times, at other times it is very realistic and no matter what type of background, or family you come from, you can not help, but reflect on your own childhood and relationship to your own parent, or guardian. The writing establishing these characters and their own problems, needs and ways of reaching out is pretty realistic and is all the more believable because of fine dialogue and top notch acting. Both, Xavier Dolan (Hubert) and Anne Dorval (Chantale) give fearless performances here going to places with their characters and their psyches and the way they pull it off with energy, sadness, facial and body language is terrific. The script and the film's direction which is also from Dolan is at times haunting, poetically beautiful at other times and it always feels so real and like he has captured life through his art. Not an easy thing to do and here he does an amazing job. Dolan wrote, directed and starred in this film at the age of 19 and this film is just as good as a film from a much older or experienced director, writer or actor. This is a terrific debut for him and mark my words because this guy is going places in a big way. I can not wait till I see what he comes out with next. I Killed My Mother has a power that stays with us and leaves us with thoughts and reflections of our own past and what we have just seen on the screen. The film does not give us any easy answers, but instead gives us room and time to digest and think more about what we have seen and I think in some ways this is a life changing film because it had an impact on me and made me look at these type of situations in a different way and I imagine it will have the same affect on other viewers. This is a towering achievement of excellence in every possible way. I Killed My Mother will go down in film books, will be studied in university film classes one day and can have some pretty scholarly people writing about it, just because there is so much here. This is probably the best film I have seen in the theatre for a long time and I could not recommend it enough. A true masterpiece.
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9/10
Masterpiece!
patrickamager3 October 2011
Wow...! What a masterpiece... I prefer to believe that Xavier Dolan is not only a shootin star, but a director, actor and writer for history... "J'ai Tué Ma Mére" is one hell of a brilliant tour de force through emotions, love, identity, sexuality.... Xavier is outstanding (as himself??) fighting against himself and his mom and surroundings - the 'battles' with his mom is unique - and the 'love-scene' after 'painting the wall' is truly a highlight.

Almost can't believe a 20-yr old wrote and directed - and played the leading part in - this excellent movie. Don't know why, but when watchin Xavier I'm thinking of James Dean (Rebel Without A Cause)and River Phoenix (My Own Private Idaho)...

Love you Xavier for this - and lookin forward to forthcoming works. So fu***n GREAT!
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Startling Directorial Debut From Xavier Dolan
Errington_927 June 2013
Warning: Spoilers
Xavier Dolan's directorial debut was a very engrossing drama with the exploration of a Mother and Son's complex relationship and imaginative use of visual imagery.

Dolan, also playing the lead of anguished homosexual teenager Hubert, is constantly at odds with his Mother Chantale. In the film's early stages their interactions are filled with tension, the clashing of personalities. As I Killed My Mother progresses Hubert and Chantale's individual notions to their relationship. Hubert longing for motherly love yet this subsides with rage and Chantale's muted reflectivity only revealing her true emotions to herself. Both Dolan and Anne Dorval brought characteristics and mannerisms to their performances which should be highly praised for its absorbing nature.

The same can also be said for I Killed My Mother's symbolic and intense technical style. On multiple occasions scenes are intercut with images to convey underlying feelings most prominently Hubert's vision of Chantale as the Virgin Mary, such imagery challenges audiences letting it simmer on our thoughts. Stéphanie Anne Weber Biron's cinematography also deserves praise particularly in scenes with Hubert and Chantale, at times isolating them from one another adding to the tension.

The thoroughly structured technical aspects and compelling performances of I Killed My Mother left myself with a wave of striving emotions, almost to tears as I was left to contemplate the marvelous achievements of a film from a first time Director.
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6/10
Hmmm
jack_o_hasanov_imdb27 August 2021
Overall, I didn't like this movie very much. X. Dolan movies do not interest me much.
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10/10
wow
andredejongh3 February 2011
Warning: Spoilers
Wow... what can I say...

I first saw Xavier Dolan's movie "Les Amours Imaginaires" which I rather loved. Without knowing Dolan's name, or knowing he was the guy also acting in the movie. But that film was so lyrical and full of visual poetry. And then this first movie of his: "J'ai tué ma mère"... has twice the intensity of Les Amours Imaginaires.

It is all just so heart felt, so open so totally vulnerable. And yet so confident. I envy Xavier Dolan. The man has a talent, a voice that has to be heard. And already at his age. The man is a true artist.

I have never seen such a beautiful movie about a young man, not yet of legal age, who is trying to be his own man, who is trying to find his own identity apart from his emotional incapable mother. They stopped being mother and son long ago and became more of a married couple with their petty little fights. She wanting to control her son by unconsciously manipulating him, as if he was her equal partner (i.e. her divorced husband), instead of a young boy that still needs love and guidance.

At the end it becomes clear that his lover Antonin whom Hubert declares his love to, is in a way a male version of his mother. He only says 'je t'aime' to the guy when he, just like Hubert's mother, is picking him up by his car, brings his clothes and is declaring that he feels like some servant and that Hubert does not care about what will happen to him at school etc.. Hubert subconsciously recognizes this behaviour from his mother and it is then, when he declares his love for Antonin.

And Hubert's mother finally stands up for her son, and thus is really, actively declaring her love for him when she tells the director of the boarding school what she really thinks of him, and thus giving her son actual motherly support.

Anyway... Lots more could be written about this movie. The only thing left to say: the man has a given talent. He has an amazing visual and symbolic sense and he knows his way with strong emotions. And in a way this movie reminds me of the emotional realism of Mike Leigh's movies, only probably without the improvisation Leigh permits his actors. And Xavier Dolan puts in lots of visual, lyrical, poetic aesthetics with lots of references to religion, arts and cultural history.

A beautiful coming of age movie. To be seen by every male or female, gay or straight, who tries, or tried in the past, to set him or herself free from a dominant parent in order to become an independent free acting man or woman with room left to breathe and to love back his/her parent(s).
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7/10
Kiss or Kill
sol-4 July 2017
Xavier Dolan's debut feature is not about a teenager who killed his mother (as per the deceptive title) but rather a teenager who wishes that his mother was dead, which to his mind amounts to pretty much the same thing. Dolan himself plays the protagonist and Anne Dorval has the role of the despised matriarch, who Dolan introduces to in closeup and slow motion as she messily consumes cream cheese on toast - one of many habits that infuriates the young man. There is, however, a lot more going on and as the film progresses, we begin to wonder whether it is less a case of him hating her and more a case of not feeling comfortable to be open with her (she only finds out that he has a steady boyfriend by chance). Dolan is smart enough to also show us the mother's side of the story, which prevents her from seeming monstrous - though ultimately one does end up siding more with him than her. Dorval is particularly effective in a surprise phone call scene; the way she stumbles while talking, her anger always seems real and not rehearsed. The film nevertheless feels a bit truncated in parts. In particular, the amount of time Dolan's character spends in the boarding school and his experiences there seem shied over. That said, the film flows better than Dolan's (nearly) twice as long 'Laurence Anyways' and it certainly barely overstays its welcome.
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10/10
Nostalgic and too personal, i love it!
blurustc3 March 2021
I recently re-visited some older Xavier Dolan movies during quarantine and i was hesitant whether i should rewatch I Killed My Mother or not for a while, mainly due to the fact that the first watch was difficult, painful and memorable, all in a good way.

I remember there was this interview of Xavier where he said he was embarrassed of this movie because of the clumsiness and all the "imperfect" details and shots, but that's the beauty of it all. These are the reasons why many young people could relate to this movie, despite it being mostly about him and his mom and despite it being based on their own dynamics, the downs and the ups and the inbetween, many people saw themselves in it. This movie felt intrusive, not towards Hubert's character and his relationship with his mom but towards me! towards you! It was intrusive towards all the viewers who experienced a similar love-hate relationship with their mothers. It was not just a movie, it was more like a personal essay, a documentary or even just a weird high quality vlog some teenager shot and put together. I was surprised to see that he doesn't realize that the messiness and clumsiness is the reason why people love this movie so much, and why it's the closest to my heart -and undoubtedly others- out of his whole filmography despite him having better movies. Even now in 2021 and having watched his whole filmography -twice for most of his films, no regents whatsoever-, it's still beyond me how wrote the script when he was only 16/17, like how did he manage to add all that depth and all these gut wrenching conversations/arguments at such a young age??? Talent at its purest.

This movie is not your traditional coming of age movie, nor is it one of those cheesy teen movies where some summer something unexpected and wonderful happens with the protagonist coming to this one big realization within the final 20 minutes or so. It's a much more honest and a much more powerful representation of a very troubled adolescent.

This movie is art and always will be.
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7/10
Few directors dare to make a debut so deeply personal like I Killed My Mother
lefkiosvanrooy28 March 2016
Xavier Dolan's directorial debut talks about the relationship between a single mother and her gay son, and heavily draws experience from the director's personal relationship with his own mother. The semi-autobiographical nature of the film is apparent in the authenticity and raw emotion expressed between the characters like the frustration and endless friction that comes from a relationship like this. It is refreshing to see this topic being explored through the eyes of a young adult, whose thoughts and opinions on the matter are still fresh and unaltered by time and circumstances that life brings. Dolan is young enough to remember well the feelings of overwhelming frustration to the level of almost hate experienced by a teenager having to deal with a difficult and sometimes intolerable mom, and at the same time is old enough to portray this relationship with some maturity and understanding of the mother's point of view. The result is a movie that will hit home to many people that have lived with their single mom in their teen years. For them this movie could be seen as a portrait of the relentless, absurd cycle of fights and tantrums, that while they may have seemed unbearable at the time (the character says that whoever does not admit hating their mother at one point in their lives is lying), are now viewed with a more comedic spin as to how insignificant they would often be.
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9/10
Masterful
zetes6 June 2014
During the recent Cannes Film Festival, while going over tweets on in competition films, the most passionate responses seemed to be for Xavier Dolan's fifth film, Mommy (it ended up winning the Jury prize). I had been hearing good things about Dolan for the past few years (mostly that he was a shockingly great director for someone so young - he directed Mommy when he was only 25 and his first film, I Killed My Mother, at 19), so, his first three films being on Netflix Instant, I decided to take the plunge. And, I must say, the buzz is more than justified. I Killed My Mother, which is most often named as his best work, is an absolutely great film - and, yes, it was directed when Dolan was only 19! It helps that the story is semi-autobiographical - the teenage point of view is very important to the film, and it's easily one of the most honest films ever made about teenagers. What's more amazing is that equal time and empathy is given to the mother character. It's hard to believe a teenage boy would have this much understanding of her point of view. Dolan himself plays Hubert, an arrogant, pretentious 16 year-old who hates his mother (Anne Dorval). While Dorval doesn't come off as a completely innocent character, either, Dolan realizes that his character is kind of a little prick. The two are constantly at each other's throats. There isn't much plot, but it's so beautifully observed. Honestly, while the film is not hard to watch and is actually kind of humorous, this hit so close to home for me that I felt devastated throughout. Both of the leads are wonderful, particularly Dorval (she also stars in Mommy, which is something of a sequel, at least in spirit). I should also mention that Dolan is a world class filmmaker. One would expect the actual cinema to be sloppy, but he pays a lot of attention to his visual compositions. This is absolutely fantastic.
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7/10
Farce and tragedy; moving and funny
Quinoa_Chris_Kirk26 September 2019
The relationship of a single mother and her gay teenage son; as he begins to individuate, their intensely loving relationship erupts with periodic bursts of volatility. A confident and audacious work for a 19-year-old first-time filmmaker, but one rooted in something many have experienced: an adolescent boy and his mother. The farce and the tragedy of this strained relationship, so compellingly and believably performed by writer/director Xavier Dolan and Anne Dorval, ripples through every beautifully composed and hysterically emotional scene.
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5/10
Undevelopped Story Conflict
Yamamono7 October 2019
Clearly the director has Mommy issues that he is using his film to work out. That's fine but the problem is that the conflict between the two main characters namely the son and the mother is not very well developed. The tension between the mother and the son often explodes into full blown hysterical tantrums that throws their relationship into a mayhem. However, the foundation of their relationship is very poorly developed and when one of those tantrums happen the viewer is left bedazzled WTF is happening. I get where the director is going with this film but I think it falls short and seems to get lost in his own intellectual and emotional catacombs.
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