The Penguins of Madagascar (TV Series)

Roger Dodger/Skorca! (2009)

James Patrick Stuart: Private

Photos 

Quotes 

• Private : [Speaking very fast]  Too much sugar, what does Skipper mean too much sugar? I like sugar and I'm the best recon man ever! I see a fire engine! Wee-ooh! Wee-ooh! Arrgh! I'm a pirate! Ooh, a caterpillar! Ha ha ha! My name backwards is Etavirp! What's a virp? Is it sugar? I love sugar!

• Marlene : Hey, guys.

  Skipper : Marlene, you really have to say something before you burst in on us like that.

  Private : Luckily you didn't set off our habitat's new security grid.

  Kowalski : Tear gas, blow darts, land mines, the whole enchilada.

  Marlene : Isn't that a little severe?

  Skipper : Is it? One of these days, you'll learn that there is only one universal language: force.

  Kowalski : And math.

  Skipper : Right. Force and math.

  Marlene : Music, also.

  Skipper : Force, math and music are really the only...

  Private : Laughter?

  [Skippers slaps Private] 

  Skipper : The point is, we speak fluent force around here, and we feel safer knowing that no one, and I mean no one, is getting inside our lair.

• Private : No, you don't understand! This orca was gigantic, and it came from the sky!

  Maurice : A sky orca?

  King Julien : A skorca! That is what the cool people will call it now, because we take two words and make them one, because it's so hip, you know. Skorca! Aaah! Who can be safe from the terror that swims the skies? No one! All who agree, vote by getting panicky... now.

• Private : I know what you're thinking. Private had too much sugar and dreamed up a flying whale that doesn't even exist.

  Kowalski : Wow! That is what I'm thinking.

  Skipper : Sugar dreams and mind-reading powers? How many Winkies did you eat?

• Private : So, after Rico trounces the rats inside Roger's body, we switch them back?

  Skipper : Exactly. It's 100% fool-proof.

  Kowalski : More precisely, it's 2.7% fool-proof. There's a 97.3% chance that this will backfire and result in a horrific abomination that will be an affront to the most elemental laws of nature and the universe.

  Skipper : I like those odds.

• Private : But I really did see a skorca. You've got to believe me!

  Skipper : And we wanna believe you, Private, but compare the evidence.

  Kowalski : On the sugary-sugar side, we have a box of empty sugar cake wrappers and your own upset tummy.

  Skipper : On the skorca's side, nothing. Less than nothing. Kowalski, what's a number less than nothing?

  Kowalski : Uh... neg-finity.

• Skipper : Maniac! Can't you see we share the same enemy?

  Joey : Joey don't share.

• Skipper : That settles it. Private, you're on aerial recon duty tonight.

  Private : By myself? All night?

  Skipper : And with potential enemies coming from all sides. It's a solder's paradise.

• [the penguins and Roger watch Rico in Roger's body beat up the rats] 

  Roger : Wow. I can't believe I'm doing all this. I have such guilt.

  Private : But you have to remember, Roger

  [He points to Rico] 

  Private : That isn't really you.

  Roger : Still, I can't stand violence of any-

  [He regurgitates a wooden sword, a bazooka and a bomb] 

  Roger : What am I doing with all this horrible stuff? This is terrible!

  Private : No, Roger, you'll have to remember...

  [He points to Roger] 

  Private : This isn't really you.

  Skipper : [pointing to Rico]  I thought you said that wasn't really him.

  Private : Well, I...

  Skipper : Pick a lane, here, Private.