User Reviews

A bunch of nubile German chicks head off to an abandoned diner before discovering that it's really home to a den of cannibals. One by one they are picked off in tame cutaway ways until the one that's left runs around a lot while whimpering. You ever see a film with a pretty cool cover which makes you think it might at least have some nice gore and be a passable entertaining time filler? Only then you put it on and it's absolutely dire and generic and totally devoid of any tension, suspense or fun? Yeah. Cannibal Diner is one of those films. Basically, it's a generic badly directed mess and most unforgivably of all, it's really boring. The director is apparently under the bizarre delusion that jumpy flashy cut off editing and long scenes of a chick stumbling around to intense urgent music equates to tension. It doesn't.

I don't want to sound too harsh here because I never expected much to begin with, and sucker as I am for all things cannibal related in horror, my standards tend to be fairly low in this regard. All I ask for is some nice gore and some perky nudity. Now while there is admittedly some perky nudity here, it's still an utterly abysmal film, that failed to even meet my low requirements, and I gotta say, I'm actually amazed that films like this even get financed. I firmly believe that for all its flaws, indie or low budget horror is actually the lifeblood of the genre, in terms of quality, but just like big budgeted and decidedly bland remakes, indie horror unfortunately throws some turkeys our way also and Cannibal Diner is a film to be avoided, as it's one of those films where your finger is itching to press the fast forward button 30 minutes in and even at 66 minutes (6 minutes are end credits) it still outstays its welcome. 2/10 a really bad and boring horror film and far too tame.

Avoid.

"Cannibal Diner" starts out nicely enough, sort of a German version of "Wrong Turn", but then the movie takes a turn for the worse and it is steeply downhill from there.

The story is about a girl trying to find her friend and sister as they are out camping. But something has gone wrong as the campsite is abandoned when she finally gets there. Stumbling through the woods, she comes across an old abandoned factory, which serves as the home for a group of cannibals.

Right, and that was basically it. The movie started out nicely enough, but once getting to the factory, the movie just dissolved into sheer stupidity. If people had been living out there as cannibals, why would they be familiar with electronic devices? And what was up with the soot-covered faces? And the entire segment where she was running around the factory with a camera set for night-vision, that was just insulting, and it carried on forever.

This movie had no scary moments, and it just become annoying towards the end. The movie is nowhere near the "Wrong Turn" movies, nor the "The Hills Have Eyes" movies, but it tries so hard to be so. I wasn't particularly impressed by this movie, and sort of sank into a boredom-induced coma towards the last third of the movie.

The title of the movie doesn't really make much sense either.

"Cannibal Diner" gets a mere 3 out of 10 stars from me.

While driving to meet her friends for a spot of camping in the countryside, Kati (Alexandra Lesch) finds herself lost. When she gets out of her car to ask for directions, her vehicle is stolen, and she finds herself wandering into a restricted industrial area that is home to a clan of cannibals.

The poster for this low budget German 'Wrong Turn' inspired horror shows its star, buxom beauty Alexandra Lesch, laying naked on her back, her naughty bits obscured by the cannibals' hands, suggesting a film brimming with gratuitous nudity. Sadly, barring a brief shower scene during the opening credits, Lesch fails to get nekkid, her ample charms remaining (mostly*) hidden under that regulation horror item of clothing, the tight white vest.

But a lack of nudity isn't the only way the film comes up short: for a German horror with the word 'cannibal' in the title, there is also a frustrating lack of gore, with only a couple of body part props and an unimpressive 'metal pole in the eye' during the whole sorry affair. For the most part, the film consists of Lesch running around a ramshackle factory, trying to avoid the flesh-eaters. As nice as it is to see such a well endowed girl bounce her way through a movie, it does get more than a little tedious when there is virtually no plot to speak of and a complete lack of originality. Chuck in a dreadfully boring final act shot almost entirely in night vision and what we have is an extremely disappointing waste of time.

2.5 out of 10, rounded up to 3 for IMDb.

*Lesch does strip to her undies towards the end of the film, but filmed in night vision (poorly lit with a green tint), it's hardly worth the wait.

I gave it two because of the hot models ruining around with tank top cleavage and short skirts.

To think Herzog, Winders, Fassbinder, Lang, all came from Germany and now this awful film. Hard to believe. The writer seems enjoy chicks running around screaming, which I believe the screams were dubbed anyway.

Other reviews are right, Wrong Turn, makes Cannibal Diner look like a student film shot on 8m.

The lead actress sure spends a lot of time running through the forest and running though an abandoned warehouse. Oops that is the movie. Not to worry about dialogue, there really isn't any. The girls are hot, and I give the casting director the most credit.

TGIF applies here, thank god its finished. Use chapter skip a lot, you will not miss anything. As for the jerky camera no light finale, um, been done before with a lot more style and narration.

There are worse movies out there than Cannibal Diner and there are a few things that keep it from being worse than it actually was. Cannibal Diner does start off promisingly with some atmosphere and tension, the music has an urgent and haunting vibe to it and the gore is thankfully not too cheap and not used too excessively. The camera work/editing and directing though were often frantic and abrupt and when they do slow down they manage to take slow to extremes. The movie is too darkly lit in places and while the settings have a nice Gothic look you couldn't properly enjoy it because of the state of the lighting and the way it was shot and edited. Cannibal Diner felt very underwritten with the dialogue sounding so awkward it was not easy to take seriously or understand what point was trying to be made. The story apart from the opening has no atmosphere, thrills or tension and just felt very pedestrian and overly-silly, with scenes that went on for far too long and didn't serve anything to the story. The antagonists, not looking terrible but also not mind-blowing either(true of most of the effects here actually), have little personality and no real menace, which made the conflict and threat really unconvincing. There's no better news about the acting, the actors look good and sexy but their acting is another matter, too often being stilted and repetitive. The chemistry is not convincing either with them sometimes being in their own world and not much else. All in all, could have been much worse but a lame movie in most but not all respects. 3/10 Bethany Cox

Seriously! Just bad! On every level! The best thing about this, is the poster! Subsequently also the DVD cover using that poster image of course (or maybe it was the other way around). There are some beautiful women in this (and one or two of them do show some skin), but this does not elevate the viewing experience.

Actually there is a scene towards the end of the movie, that is almost completely dark, which is almost kind of good. It does create some atmosphere. But too little too late! The effects are OK and maybe the only thing that might make the viewing experience not a complete disaster. It's a shame, because the filmmaker is such a nice guy. And it's good that he tries to do genre cinema in Germany ... but he has some work to do!

Shameful on the Cannibal movies category it's shameful compared to Cannibal Holocaust, Cannibal Ferox, and Jungle Holocaust. Even Eli Roth's Green Inferno dominates over this thing. This was dreadful.

This is for the people that are into movies like Dead Snow, Wrong Turn, The Collector, Creep the list goes on that are nearly the same as this. There's no plot, there's no attempt at a story. Our main character has the brain of a toothpick. The beginning of this movie kills the rest of it, simply cuz she does not know how to take a pair of car keys, and not go somewhere where a sign says not to. Out of everywhere to get help, she goes into the factory, which looks like it came out of a nuclear waist-land.

She is the only character with depth. All 5 other women do not even exist in the movie. They are there for 5 seconds and that's it. Also, the main character says the F word every time, and then it's silence. That's all of her voicings.

The title CANNIBAL DINER and the poster led me to imagine that this was going to be a movie about an establishment that serves up human flesh for the eating. Though admittedly quite distasteful, the topic has had some surprisingly good treatments, such as DELICATESSEN (1991), EATING RAOUL (1982) and especially THE GREEN BUTCHERS (2003). Even cheesier treatments like MOTEL HELL (1980) and THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE 2(1986), which are not really good movies, have managed to do something with this idea. Alas, the title is positively deceptive and, in a way, so is the poster: there are cannibals, but there is no diner (could it be that the German film-makers meant "dinner"??).

This film turns out to be yet another take on the well-worn theme of hot chicks being hunted, this time by chemically contaminated cannibal mutants(?) who are just actors in black face-paint.

Though I would not call this film amateurish, it comes close. Even worse, it lacks even one ounce of originality, as most scenes are borrowed from other movies. There are many scenes of the girls walking around which end up just providing ample opportunities to check how much longer the movie is going to be. In more than one of those walking scenes, I was stunned by the incongruence between the lack of tension in the scene and the excitement conveyed by the stock music, even more so because the director apparently also wrote some of the music, and as such would have been expected to have a better feel for how the music and the visuals go together.

This movie's worst sin is that it is unrelentingly, mercilessly boring. I do not think I have ever checked as much and impatiently anticipated when a film is going to be over, even though it clocks in at only 75 minutes.

I sometimes read in negative movie reviews expressions of regret or anger about how the reviewer's time was wasted, but this kind of thought almost never occurs to me. I appreciate that putting together a movie is a major undertaking, and even if it is bad, it still represents a sustained effort by a group of people to make a vision a reality. This deserves to be applauded and appreciated just on its own. And usually I do, and therefore I almost never regard my time as wasted, even if the film was profoundly bad.

But here, the pointless ending after having endured excessively indulgent yet stultifyingly boring walking/chasing scenes did actually bring up feelings of annoyance at having wasted my time with this. In the future, I will strictly avoid all works by this director.

I was looking forward to Frank's new horror after seen the trailer last year at a horror convention finally this year at the same convention this flick was sold. It all looked promising but once this flick was over I was left with a bitter feeling.

It's clear to see that Frank has watched horror since his last attempt Slasher (2007). In fact Cannibal Diner is a combination of a slasher flick with some found footage stuff combined with the night vision option on the camera. And let that last part be a bit boring. To be honest, Cannibal Diner was a bit boring. All we do see is a lot of running away from things to come. You can hear the voices of the deformed but they are a bit tame. They are a mix between Wrong Turn and Texas Chainsaw but by then it's all too late. Or main lead is in fact a voluptuous beauty but she even teases the viewer with nudity, yes, we do have a shower scene were nothing is revealed and she does strip before the night vision camera but leaves her underwear on, and to say something about mistakes, her underwear do change a lot throughout this flick even as it takes place at the same day, how does she does that wink wink, big continuity fault.

Even the parts in the woods aren't suspenseful. No, Cannibal Diner isn't a feast.

Gore 0/5 Nudity 0,5/5 Effects 2/5 Story 0/5 Comedy 0/5

I Liked the end song very good music i Liked the naked girls running around and screaming

I cannot understand why the director of this film and the rest guys who set it up havent killed themselves yet. I havent seen such a bad movie ever. Tooooo slow, nothing is happening through the entire movie, we see girls searching and searching... Girls running and running .. Girls screaming and screaming .. Nothing more, please do not try seeing this

I was seeking mindless, escapist entertainment and boy did I find it. Frank W. Montag is listed as the writer and director of this nonsense and he should not be allowed to be near a camera for the rest of his life on earth.

It begins with a few model friends who venture into the woods and set up a tent. They drink some wine and snort some coke before being vanquished by an unseen force.

Next up is Kati(Alexandra Lesch) and she is to meet up with her fellow models in the forest. Somehow, she winds up in an old factory warehouse where she meets up with some individuals with a taste for human flesh.

Alexandra is quite well built but for those expecting a flash of her ample bosom, forget it. She spends the last fifteen minutes or so running and screaming.

One of the villains is in blackface and I was waiting for him to belt out "Mammy" but he only grunted his infrequent lines. I need one hour and fifteen minutes of my life back.

After getting lost on a camping trip, three friends discover an abandoned factory in the woods. Little do they know that it's inhabited...by cannibals.

I didn't have high hopes for this and even then it disappointed me. Nothing good about it: basic plot that veers into the nonsensical frequently, amateurish direction, acting and editing.

Worst of all, the writer and director borrow scenes and plot ideas from other movies, to the point that this movie is really just a montage of scenes from other movies. The victims are often quite to spot, e.g. Wrong Turn (all six or so of them), The Shining, REC, The Blair Witch Project.

Avoid.

A group of German beauties head into the countryside for a get together and get taken out by a family of deranged and filthy cannibals. Also released through Troma as Bikini Swamp Girl Massacre, it was surprisingly well shot, and had some good tension. But pretty much another Texas Chainsaw rip-off, with a bit of found footage chucked in.