Reviews

Thought The Usual Suspects was hard to follow? Then you'll be a drooling idiot at the end of The Way of the Gun. It's a good movie. Not a great movie by any stretch of the imagination, but it's got an interesting plot, lots of twists, and a good helping of violence. I like the bloody parts. Ah, I'm a simple man. The part that I was less excited about was the double cross followed by the double cross followed by the double cross. If I think really hard, I can probably come up with a character or two that didn't have an ulterior motive. It just drains you after a while. I'll definitely need to see it a second time (probably even a third or fourth to get all the connections), and too me, that's just frustrating. It's not about making you think. The Usual Suspects did that without confusing the hell out of you, so what gives, Chris? Good performances all around, Ryan and Benicio and James Caan stand out. Also, I don't think I've ever seen a pregnant woman used in a stand-off before, so that's kinda cool. I'd have to give it a 7/10 stars. Maybe his next project will be a little more, I don't know... coherent. G'night!

Fight Club is definitely not what I expected. I thought I knew what the film was about from the commercials. I was wrong. I mean REALLY wrong. I walked out of the theatre not knowing what it was that I just watched. Was it a dark comedy? Social commentary? Commercial satire? An exercise in style over substance? I don't know. Maybe all of the above, maybe none. I think it is a mistake to over analyse this movie. And let's face it, the media made way to big of a deal about the violence in this movie. I remember one station reporting that there was some fear that real life "fight clubs" would start springing up around the country. Get real. The fact is, most guys don't like to get in fights, or more specifically, they don't like to be hit. Maybe after a couple or ten beers, but not usually. It's taken me three or four viewings to fully appreciate this film. The directing is excellent. Fincher is a huge talent, and with this and Se7en on his resume, he's the kind of filmmaker that you know you're going to get something interesting from. Pitt can be great when he picks the right parts. And Norton is easily my favourite young actor. He always comes through. I don't really believe in a lot of the ideas that Fight Club pushes, but it's interesting none the less. And there are a lot of laughs between the gruesome beatings. Just don't take it too seriously, and you'll be okay. I give it an 8/10 stars. G'night!

The Boondock Saints is so incredibly bad, I eventually embraced it with a sick fascination, watching as it ripped off so many of my favorite movies ("Oh, I remember that form that Tarantino, Rodriguez, Woo, Ritchie, Stone, Scorcese Movie!"). I almost don't know where to begin, so I'll start with the one scene that I liked. It was between Willem Dafoe and a priest in confessional as Dafoe struggles with his conscience. It was surprisingly well written and well acted and is the only redeeming scene in the whole film, to be honest.

The fact that this movie blatantly steals scenes from other, better movies is not what makes it so bad (but now that I think of it, stealing is one of the crimes that is punishable by death according to the Saints. We should be so lucky). No, what makes Boondock Saints bad is that it does such a poor job of ripping them off. John Woo might consider dying early so he can start spinning in his grave. I can practically see him taking a razor to his own wrist during the laughable shoot-out between the Saints and Billy Connelly (that's right, I said Billy Connelly). Woo might say something like, "What have I wrought? The horror, the horror!" right before his arterial spray covered his big screen television. Another tragic, Boondock Saints related death.

You might find yourself asking certain questions while watching this movie. Fear not, for I have the answers you seek! For example you might say to yourself, how are these guys with so good at killing when they have no experience and their basic attack plans involve standing in the center of rooms surrounded by bad guys with only a handgun in each paw and some cool sunglasses. That's easy - It's obvious that they've seen John Woo films and know that a guy firing two guns at once looks too damn cool to get killed, and because all these scenes are in unnecessary slow motion shots it gives them plenty of time to dodge the bullets. Another question you might ask is why is the Willem Dafoe character gay when it's obvious that writer/director Troy Duffy knows even less about gay people than I do? What a silly question. It's so that Duffy can have ridiculous scenes where Dafoe prances around crime scenes while listening to CDs on his portable disc player as if he were conducting an orchestra instead of gathering evidence. So he can include clever scenes of Dafoe calling his lover a fag because he wants to cuddle and saying something similar to a bartender at a gay bar. See, he's a macho homosexual. He's a rebel. He doesn't play by the rules, and he sure as hell doesn't cuddle. Oh, and we must not forget the scene where Dafoe dresses up as a blond prostitute so he can infiltrate the mob's headquarters. I would have liked to see how this movie played in San Francisco. I can picture men turning to the person next to them and saying, "We don't act like that, do we?" Why do they say a prayer before whacking the bad guys? Don't you know anything? It's because they've seen Pulp Fiction, only Samuel L. Jackson's character was more honest about his motivations for quoting the Bible.

Some random complaints I have - an extremely poor attempt at capturing the randomness, shock and surprise of Vincent Vega and Marvin's "explosive" conversation in the back of Jules' car in Pulp Fiction. A little of Rocko goes a long way, and I felt cheated when he wasn't given a slow, painful death. It would be my guess that Rocko's command of the english language is not the greatest as he seems to only know about fifty words, half of which begin with "F" and end in "K". How did Billy Connelly become such a feared hitman when his method of whacking a guy involves standing in the middle of the street in broad daylight with a bunch of guns under his trench coat and waiting to be seen before firing. This could only seem like an ambush to the Saints, probably thinking, "Why didn't we think of that?" Rocko's extremely old and lame joke that grinds the movie to a dead halt. And the list goes on.

Those wacky Weinstien brothers - when they're not frequenting bars looking for the next Quintin Tarantino or Kevin Smith, they're buying Oscars (I'll never forgive them for robbing Saving Private Ryan of Best Picture). Guys, stick to what you know best. The money spent making this film would have been better spent on the catering budget on the next Scream film. Someone really has to feed Courtney Cox. Apparently lack of food has made her dizzy and she accidentally married David Arquette. Someone get her a Twinkie, STAT! But I digress. This movie is a terrible waste of time. It was recommended to me by some young crack addicts who thought it was the greatest film ever made. But that seems to be the general consensus regarding this film. People love it. So I guess that makes me wrong this time, does it? No, that can't be it. Everyone else is wrong, I'm right. 2/10 stars for this turkey. G'night!

I didn't know what to expect from Boiler Room when I rented it. I knew it had two of my favourite young actors (Giovanni Ribisi and Vin Diesel), and that it looked like Stone's Wall Street for the Melrose Place crowd, or Wall Street Junior. It's been a long time since I've seen Wall Street, but I did like this one quite a bit. It's got one hell of an edge to it, more than I would have ever expected from a movie about stock brokers. Ribisi is great, as always, and I think I'm going to be watching for any future Diesel projects (his work in Saving Private Ryan and Pitch Black are terrific). Ben Affleck has a brief role similar to the infamous Alec Baldwin "motivational speaker" in Glengarry Glen Ross, and he is fun to watch. Sure, guido-wiseguy-stock brokers sounds like an unusual, maybe even lame idea for a movie, but Boiler Room really grabs your attention and keeps it with great performances and a good script. 8/10 stars. G'night!

Funniest (and most accurate) description of Any Given Sunday that I've heard? Tackling Private Ryan. For a football movie, it's pretty damn epic (epic, in movie terms, has come to describe any movie over two and a half hours). I liked it. I liked it quite a bit. It's kind of a patchwork of about a dozen football movie cliches sewn into one, all under one of the modern masters of film, Oliver Stone. The old quarterback, trying desperately to hold on, the young rookie, nipping at his heels, the duelling doctors, one in it for the fame, the other well, for the fame, but with some concern for the players, the player risking brain damage if he can just hold out for one more game, the new female owner (surprise! she's a power hungry b****), you get the idea by now. Any of these cliches by themselves would make for a pretty crappy movie, but when you throw them all together, when you only spend a little time on each one, and when you mix them Stone's hyper kinetic, MTV style football clips you get a thrilling experience. I also appreciated the lack of on-the-field football cliches here, since you cannot decipher any sort of plays being made. It's all footballs being thrown, guys being tackled, and cheering crowds. Good performances by the whole cast (and what a cast! Stone's out-done himself once again in casting familiar faces). Pachino gives a surprisingly restrained performance here, as his character is supposed to be old, tired, and almost over the hill. James Woods is a scene stealer (as usual). Stone's one of the greats, so please, don't knock him for doing a football movie. I've heard some people say, "He's the man behind Natural Born Killers, JFK, Platoon, Nixon, Born on the Fourth of July, and now he's doing this?". The man has paid his dues, if he wants to do a football movie, no one is more entitled to do so. Now, if it were a bad football movie, I'd be the first one to complain, but it's not. 7/10 stars. G'night!

Dick is so unbelievably funny. It's one of those movies that gets funnier with repeated viewing, kinda like Kids in the Hall: Brain Candy (doesn't hurt that it has two former Hall cast members). And what a cast it has. Lets take a look, we got the SNL crew (Will Ferrell, Ana Gasteyer, Jim Breuer), the Hall boys (Bruce McCulloch, Dave Foley), Simpsons voice Harry Shearer, and two cute as a button up and coming young actresses (Kirsten Dunst, Michelle Williams). But the big surprises for me were Hedaya and Rubinek, who would gave the most subtle, brilliant performances, and some of the biggest laughs. Rubinek, for example, only had a handful of lines in the film as Kissenger, but they're the ones that stuck with me. Little things like, "I'm familiar with these girls. Don't you look at me that way!" and "Yes, I know what nyet, nyet means". And Hedaya's evil Nixon was just hysterical, probably the most perfect comedic bad guy since Dr. Evil. How can you not love a villain with lines like, "Checkers--shut up! Or I'll feed you to the Chinese!". These guys had me in hysterics.

This from the writer/director of The Craft? Talk about a step in the right direction! But I could probably tell you without checking that The Craft made more money at the box office, sadly. But the centre of the film is Dunst and Williams, and if they weren't so incredibly good as the two air heads, the movie probably wouldn't have worked, despite the best efforts of the talented cast. Foley says it best, "I have met yams with more going on upstairs than these two." The movie keeps sneaking up on you with these quite, brilliant little lines, like the girls walking down a hallway, "I think it was left.", "That's because you couldn't turn right". Not to mention a terrific 70's soundtrack, and I don't even like music from that era (Nixon walking off to "You're so Vain" was the greatest!) Okay, I've said enough. Did I mention I liked this movie? See this movie. I'm Canadian, I don't understand exactly what Watergate was about (despite having seen Oliver Stone's Nixon twice), and I was just learning to walk when Nixon was forced out of office so I didn't recognize many of the names thrown around, but I loved it all the same and was able to get all of the jokes. 9/10 stars. G'night!

The Dark Half is great. Put two of the masters of horror together in a box, shake ‘em up, and you get this very entertaining and darkly humorous story. Can you believe this is the latest film from George Romero? 1993? It's a crime that this man isn't doing movies on a regular basis anymore. I hear he has a couple of projects on the horizon, but seven years is just too long, George! Stephen King movie adaptions can be pretty damn good, or really, really awful depending on who's behind the camera. Well, no worries here, King and Romero have had a great working relationship in the past (and I expect good things in the future).

But give credit where credit is due, it's Timothy Hutton's outstanding performance that really makes this film special for me. He's good enough as ordinary Thad Beaumont, with just a hint of evil underneath his nice husband and father persona, holding back the nasty as best he can. Then Hutton is George Stark, and he doesn't even look like the same person. That's why Hutton is so damn good. With just a few minor changes, slicked-back hair and some facial stubble, he's a completely different person. You have to see it to believe it, he's that good. And he delivers the films darkly humorous lines perfectly ("What's going on out here?", "Murder. Want some?"). I know, the murderous joker has been done to death, but Hutton's good enough that we can forgive it. I love, love, love horror movies and this is one of the reasons why. 8/10 stars. G'night!

You ask me, I think Phantoms is a pretty slick little horror pic. But what do I know? Everyone hates it, I like it. Haven't read a lot of Dean Koontz novels, just one in fact. Watchers. Now if ever there was a screw up of a movie adaption, that was it. But anything with one of the 80's tag-team Coreys in it (in this case, Haim), is instant death as far as I'm concerned. But this time Koontz, tired of Hollywood raping and murdering his novels for the screen, decided he would pen the screenplay for Phantoms his own self, and I think he did a pretty bang up job. I mean, with the exception of lines like, "Well, its the devil don't you think, come up from hell tonite? I think he wants to dance with us." Yikes! Take it easy, Dean. Lines like that just don't make the transfer from page to screen that easy. But what do you want, it's Rose McGowan. It was probably like doing Shakespear for her. Mustn't forget Liev Schreiber, who is a riot as the creepy deputy. Man, I wanted to see more of this guy. He steals every scene he's in with those huge glasses and goofy smile. What a character. Ben Affleck's pretty good too. Ben is all over the place, ain't he? Unlike best buddy Matt Damon, his career is full of ups and downs. Matt may only do one or two movies a year, but when he does you know they're worth watching. Ben does everything from box office smashes (Armageddon) to lame Sandra Bullock romantic comedies (Forces of Nature). Dude has got to stop doing everything that is offered him.

I think Joe Chappelle is a better than average horror director. Actually, he's pretty talented. Some interesting scenes, though a little reminiscent of other, better horror films. The 80's remake of The Blob comes to mind (in several scenes), and a touch of John Carpenter's The Thing (yet another remake. What gives?). For those who haven't seen the movie, I won't say who or what the antagonist of this film is (that's kinda part of the fun of watching it). The first half hour to forty five minutes will leave you guessing as to what is killing the townsfolk. I don't think I'm giving too much away if I say the "Ancient Enemy" is basically the same bad guy from Stephen King's "It". Basically, but I don't think it was ripped off (for one reason because I doubt either author would steal from the other, and also because I'm not sure which novel was written first). It's also a little bit H.P. Lovecraft in a way. Or so I say, having never read anything by Lovecraft myself. Better stop now, before I reveal myself for the fraud I am. "Wait a minute, he never even saw the movie!". Gulp! 8/10 stars for me.

Raiders of the Lost Ark is one of those films that has earned every bit of success and critical praise it has been given over the years. It's the perfect adventure film, it raised the bar for the genre to such a high point, that I personally haven't been able to view any other movies of this type without making comparisons. But really, I can't think of any movies that have even tried to attempt to capture the excitement of Raiders. There have been other adventure films in the last twenty years, but none have really been on the scale of this, or any of the Jones films. The movie is a laugh riot on top of everything else. I was watching it not too long ago with my father, during the famous scene between Indy and the swordsman who takes a knife to a gunfight he remembered how the audience was in hysterics, how it was one of the biggest laughs he had ever had at a movie (I was too young to remember). This film inspires these types of memories in a lot of people, which pretty much guarantees its status as one of the greatest films ever made. But there had to have been high expectations at the time, from the director of Jaws and the creator of Star Wars, two of the highest grossing films of all time.

Yep, not much to be said about this one that hasn't already been said. So let me ask something. Why do so many people spend time summarizing the plot of this film in the "User Comments" section of IMDB anyway? Aren't there many places you could go to for the plot of a film? That's not really commenting on the movie if all you're doing is giving a greatly detailed description of the story with a quick, "I liked it!" at the end, is it? This really brings out the anal retentive in me. Oh well, looks like it's time for me to get a life. 10/10 stars, Raiders of the Lost Ark is a hum-dinger of a movie. Don't ask me what that means. I heard someone say it once and thought it was funny. G'night!

Martin Scorsese is the master, so all you youngsters kneel down and pay homage to a living legend. Martin keeps showing them how it's done in Bringing Out the Dead, a perfect example of the master at work. I've heard the guy lives, breaths, sleeps and eats film, and it shows. This movie is a masterpiece, a great film in a year full of great films. He and frequent collaborator Paul Schrader get together and make some noise in a story that takes place in New York in the early ‘90s. They have to say it's the early ‘90s at the beginning because Mayor Guilliani has cleaned the city up a lot at this point. Way to go Rudy! One could say Schrader and Scorsese is one of the most successful collaborations of all time, throw Robert De Niro into the mix and this movie would have been a Scorsese/Schrader/De Niro fans wet dream. But with Nick Cage in the lead you still can't go wrong.

Let's talk about the cast for a sec. Cage is incredible as a burnt out paramedic. Sizemore steals every scene he's in, he is such a riot as the psychotic veteran. I always like John Goodman, and Arquette doesn't irritate me as much as usual, so I guess I can't complain there. Ving Rhames, in my humble opinion, gives his best performance since Pulp Fiction. I really like Ving, he just needs the right roles to show of his acting chops. The movie was the type that sort of grabbed me when I saw it in the theatre. It was a movie experience, the kind that you and the whole audience are enjoying, laughing at all the right parts, silence at all the key dramatic moments (except for that guy with the damn cell phone. Those people ought to be dragged out into the street and shot. Who's with me?). All this and a kick-ass soundtrack add up to an excellent movie-going experience. Kudos to Scorsese and the gang. This one was funny, powerful, and altogether entertaining. Love this movie. 10/10 stars, baby! G'night!

Wow! I have so much love for this movie, it's incredible! Godzilla 2000 is a movie experience, baby! I really didn't really know what to expect from this one. I knew it was a re-dubbed version for American audiences, but I wasn't going to be disappointed if it wasn't as cool as the old Godzilla films a remember enjoying as a kid. Well, they did a terrific job dubbing this one. I find most times they tend to follow they Japanese dialogue a little too closely, but you could tell they went nuts with it this time! There are a few really memorable lines in here. Classic giant monster movie stuff. And that last line is so great, it had me laughing in hysterics! This is the first "real" Godzilla film I've got to see on the big screen, but I hope it's not my last. I hope this makes enough money that they start re-releasing all of them, and maybe the Gamera films that I've heard so many good things about. But I have a bad feeling that it would be a hard sell, since these things are of limited interest to the general public. It's a shame, because this was more entertaining than a lot of the films I've seen this summer.

I really hope this does well, and I encourage everyone to see it. It's almost like going to see a cult classic movie in many ways. Everyone at the show I attended must have been Godzilla fans at some point of their life, because they loved it. I've been to a hell of a lot of movies over the years, but to my recollection I can't remember one that ended to such thunderous applause and laughter. I left with a big smile on my face that didn't go away until much later. I guarantee that everyone there had a good time, because the fun of the movie is contagious. It's cheesy for sure, but it's good cheese. And there is something classically beautiful about the original guy-in-rubber-suit Godzilla. I still get a charge out of seeing buildings get demolished under his huge feet, watching as his tail destroys skyscrapers, and seeing his radioactive breath fry the bad guys (in this case, a big living alien ship). I might not be the typical movie fan, but I believe that this is a movie that everyone can enjoy. Just lie back and let it sweep you up in its campiness. Amazingly funny stuff, and I have to give it an 8/10 stars. Whoever re-dubbed this has a wild sense of humour! G'night!

The Green Mile is one of those movies for people who love movies. It's a combination of a terrific cast, a hot director, great script, likeable characters, and Tom Hanks, whom the term "likeable" seems to have been invented for. This movie was custom made for the Oscars, and although it did not take away the awards it would have liked to, two best picture nominations for Darabont's first two directorial efforts ain't bad at all. Maybe it doesn't break any new ground when compared to some of the more outstanding achievements of ‘99, but that doesn't matter. It's a movie, made for those of us who enjoy going to the movies, packed full of high drama, a decent helping of suspense, and some generally moving sequences. It also finds a way to slip in a message in what has to be one of the most gruesome deaths I've ever seen in a movie, but at the same time it manages to not be preachy. it's not hard to see that this movie is probably against the death penalty, but I think it treats the subject in a fair and even-handed way. I think this movie will have made a Hollywood heavy-hitter out of Frank Darabont, and it couldn't have happened to a more worthy guy. It's also unfair that he has taken criticism for doing two Stephen King novel adaptions in a row, and both having focused around a prison. Besides the obvious similarities, the two films are completely different, and I wouldn't mind if he made a career out of adapting King/prison movies if they were all as good as Shawshank and the Mile.

Let's start with Hanks. Y'know, ten years ago I would never have guessed that Tom would be the huge player that he is now, nor that he would be suited for such roles as diverse as a grizzled army captain in WWII, an unfortunate, gentle AIDS victim, a lovable mentally challenged ping-pong champion or the executioner of death row inmates in a Louisiana penitentiary. Times, they have a-changed, my friends. Doesn't mean I rush to the theatres to see the latest Hanks film, some are better than others, but he deserves a lot of respect for rising to the top of the heap in Hollywood dramatic pictures. I like him. Who doesn't? Other actors of note were David Morse (he never disappoints, but I'd like to see more of him in leading roles. Remember The Crossing Guard, anyone?), and Sam Rockwell, who must be a rising star because he steals every scene he's in in this one. Wild Bill is one sick puppy, but I'll be dammed if he isn't a riot to watch as he torments the guards on the green mile. Other actors I enjoy are Gary Senise, James Cromwell and Barry Pepper. All are good, but they aren't given much to do so they don't leave a lasting impression. Michael Clarke Duncan does a good job as the enormous, simple and gifted man, but I wasn't sure it was Oscar worthy. I often wonder how hard it really is to play a mentally challenged person, since it seems every year at the Oscars there are always a few nominees for playing the part. He just seemed a little too sweet to me, but that may be the fault of the writers, but the award did go to Michael Caine for what was considered by many to be a terrible movie, so what do I know? My only complaint would have to be the length of it all. I really feel that is could have used a few cuts to speed it up a bit, but that's about it. The first time I watched it I was constantly comparing it to The Shawshank Redemption in my mind (a superior film, in my opinion), so I was a little disappointed, but that was unfair of me. Standing alone, this is a great film and it deserves all of the praise it has received. If you love going to the movies, chances are you'll love The Green Mile. 9/10 stars. G'night!

The Cell is pretty dammed bizarre to be sure, but it is one of the most challenging films I've seen in quite a while. The detective scenes are as smartly done as those in Se7en, and the dream scape inside the killers' mind scenes are as strange and beautiful as a well-directed NIN or Marilyn Manson video. After watching it for the second time (it's that type of movie), I was struck by how seriously it took its subject matter. There really aren't any light moments in it, but I wasn't bothered by its tone, and I wouldn't call it pretentious, I was simply fascinated by its energy and endless imagination. I hope that the unusual visuals and slightly bent storyline doesn't scare audiences away. It's a wonderful film and it deserves to be seen, just try not spend the whole movie trying to decipher its images. The bare bones of the plot is easy to follow, but you can go mad while trying to figure out the significance of certain scenes. Save that for the second viewing.

Jennifer Lopez is a star, and she really shines in this one. She's naturally so stunningly beautiful that when you see her in her idealized self inside the mind, it is quite a sight. She's a hottie, I just wish she'd give up the singing and get back to making movies on a regular basis. It's good to see Vince Vaughn in a good movie again (Psycho still leaving a bad taste in my mouth). This guy has a lot of potential, he just needs to be in the right projects. Vincent D'Onofrio is an interesting actor, and he seems to make a habit of playing very strange and unusual characters. The guy he plays in this one is creepy even by serial killer standards. He's the kind of killer that gives Dahmer and Manson the creeps. I've seen serial killers portrayed better in other films, but Vincent does well. We're so used to seeing Hannibal Lector, insane genius types in films that his turn as a more simple beast is a little different. He's very methodical, but you don't get any real sense of genius in him, which probably makes him more realistic, just not as fun to watch as Spacey in Se7en or Tom Noonan in Manhunter. The big surprise is Tarsem Singh, former commercial and music video director's (I really need to find out which ones) big screen debut. The world of music videos is turning out some of the most interesting directors in film today (David Fincher immediately comes to mind). He's going to have a hard time finding a project after this that lets him be so free to create whole new worlds of unreality to play in, but I eagerly await his next offering. This movie deserves a 10/10 stars just for being so fresh. I wish more movies showed this kind of imagination. G'night!

Legend is probably one of the most visually interesting films I've ever seen. It's a fairy tale, filled with beautiful and horrible images and it left me breathless. Funny, I've never really been a fan of fairy tales, in cinema or in story books as a child, but give it to Ridley Scott to direct and you have quite an experience. I've been a fan of his for a while now, and it's good to see him back on top with last summers hit Gladiator. RIDLEY RULES! Okay, I'll try to refrain from any more fits of orgasmic glee about Scott, back to the film at hand. Lotta eye candy to be seen. Opening with the forest full of flower petals (?). Goblins wadding through snow drifts up to their necks. But most of all, the castle of Darkness. I had forgotten how gruesome the devils' kitchen actually was. Was this movie originally intended for children? It seems a little unlikely, though I know both children and adults can enjoy it. I liked it as a kid, and if anything I probably enjoy it more as an adult.

Cruise and Sara both do well enough in their roles. This is almost the ‘forgotten' Tom Cruise movie. But the star of this show is Darkness, no ‘ifs', ‘ands' or ‘buts' about it, baby! Is that really Tim Curry under all of that make-up and prosthetics? Can't be! Did he work out for this role? One of the most stunningly beautiful villains in the history of film, the work that must have gone into his costume alone... it boggles the mind. Those horns are just incredible. Darkness is the most visually interesting cinematic interpretation of the devil that I've seen (though if he's the devil, who is his ‘father' that he is seen speaking to?). I'm torn as to whether the ‘humpback whales mating' sounds that play when we see the unicorns is neat or annoying (I'm leaning towards annoying). I've also heard that they replaced the original musical score with something more ‘child-friendly', which is disappointing. But this works mainly as a visual feast. This one deserves an 8/10 stars, so see it if you haven't already. G'night!

The Minus Man is an odd little film to be sure. It's about a serial killer, but calling it a serial killer movie is almost misleading. Why? It follows Owen Wilson as he bumps off a few people on his way to finding happiness, but it's not violent and the movie doesn't really dwell on the murders. For reasons that are unclear, Owen just decides every now and again that someone has to go, and then they're gone. More than anything this movie seems to be about the people he lives and works with. There's Mercedes Ruehl and Brian Cox, the married couple he rents a room from. They're having marriage trouble, but we never quite figure out why They make for a very strange couple. His co-worker, played by Janeane Garofalo, seems really desperate for love, but Owen just isn't interested. He seems to enjoy her company, but he never really lets himself get close. This makes for a strange relationship, too. Is he leading her on? Has he ever really been close with a woman? More unanswered questions.

I guess I like this movie, but I'm having trouble putting my finger on exactly what I liked about it. First off, I like Owen, I think he's a cool actor. I haven't seen Bottle Rocket or Rushmore, but I've heard he and his brother Luke are talented writer/directors as well. He's been getting a lot of little parts in big budget Hollywood pics lately, but he shines in The Minus Man. Here he's not really insane, because he knows what he's doing is wrong and he feels guilty. He has nightmares and blackouts while he envisions the two policemen who will eventually catch him for his crimes. What a nice guy, I mean except for all the killing, of coarse. I like Janeane, and she plays a much different part here than usual. Mostly, she seems to play herself. Sarcastic and witty and a little nasty. Her character this time is really insecure, kinda dull, and... what the hell? She's nice! It sorta throws you off. So I liked it, not as much as I had hoped, but it was still interesting. I give it a 7/10 stars. G'night!

The 1988 version of The Blob is actually a much better film than it has any business being. For starters, it's a remake of a ‘50s B-horror flick about some space Jell-O that eats a small town. Sounds like a recipe for disaster, a train wreck waiting to happen, doesn't it? Not in the hands of mad genius' Chuck Russell and Frank Darabont. These two sure throw a helluva party! And with a budget of about $10 million (huge for a horror film at that time) they manage to dazzle us with clever uses of special effects techniques. I had no idea space Jell-O could move that fast!

Darabont and Russell provide a script packed full of surprises and pure mayhem. I really enjoy not being able to predict who's going to be lunch in a movie, and this movie has a way of devouring some of the most likable characters when you least expect it. What's that you say? Likable characters in a dead teenager flick? Can't be! Yes, it's true, you might actually be torn between rooting for the Blob or the townsfolk. But I won't blame you for rooting for the Blob. It is very cool to watch something grab people with giant pink tentacles and digest them in front of their loved ones' eyes. This is truly a horror film with some brains, and I think it measures up with anything made today. The special effects (way before CGI) are well done and impressive, not to mention gory. Shows you can do wonders with stop-motion and a good make-up/prosthetic artist. 9/10 stars for this thrill ride! G'night!

THE HUMUNGOUS!!! And the crowd goes wild! There's just something about a warlord so in love with the sound of his own voice that he brings loudspeakers with him wherever he goes. I half-expected him to break into song at any point, ("Why do birds suddenly appear..."). The Humungous is just one of many odd and violent characters wandering post apocalyptic Australia in what must be the ultimate trilogy of action films from down under, the Mad Max films. The Road Warrior kicks much booty to be sure. I'm sure the manic action and ultra violence were probably unlike anything mainstream America had seen at that time, and the audiences loved it (many of them having never seen the original masterpiece, hence the removal of any reference to it being a sequel in the title, as explained in the special edition video). Mel Gibson is great, aside from the fact that he is almost a mute through most of the film. Almost twenty years ago... ah, memories. Well, it certainly has stood the test of time, by golly. Makes a lot of the summer action flicks now look down right stupid in comparison. Computer effects. BAH! Who needs ‘em? Why, in Max's day stunt men drove bikes off bridges and broke every bone in their body and they liked it! "WHOO-HOO! Look at me, I'm a cripple for life!" By God, they knew how to make a movie in those days. Crazy Aussies, you gotta love ‘em.

Still, the first Max is the best of the lot. I was kinda hoping Max would kick a little more mutant butt throughout, but hey, who am I to complain? The action sequences are still pretty intense, with a spectacular chase scene at the end. Murder, carnage, and bloodshed, oh my! I think George Miller does well in sticking with the winning formula of the first film, which is placing Max amongst a whole lot of mutant road-rages with the need for speed and watching him out-gun, out-think, and just plain out-rage them. They don't call him "Mad" for nothing, he's the craziest mother f***** on the highway. They just don't do stunts like these anymore (unless you're certifiable, or Jackie Chan). God bless their little hearts. If you haven't already, I really recommend you see this movie and watch in awe The Lord Humungous unleash his Dogs of War on Max and company. You won't be disappointed. 8/10 stars, a carnage lovers delight! G'night!

Space Cowboys is full of surprises. I didn't really know what to expect from the previews of this one. Was it a comedy or a special effects film? The answer is it's a comedy, for the most part, but it's a comedy with heart. I really had no idea Clint had such a knack for directing comedy. He's done comedy in the past, but this movie is hysterical. I can't think of a movie in recent memory where I laughed this hard. Not at all what I was expecting in the least. The interaction between the characters was so good on the ground that when they finally went into space it almost seemed cliche at times. It was all very well handled, and of coarse they had to go into space for the big finale, but by that point we're interested in the people, not whether or not they can fix some satellite and save the world. On the other hand, Clint handles the space scenes extremely well, something I was sceptical about going in (I don't believe he has ever directed an effects film, but after seeing this I think he could give Michael Bay lessons. Sometimes less is more, Mike).

This movie is just plain goodness. Old Clint does not disappoint in the leading roll. Tommy Lee Jones shares the spotlight and does a great job too. His performance is very sweet, and I really enjoyed his relationship with Marcia Gay Harden. Donald Sutherland (very funny) and James Garner have mostly supporting roles this time out, the main focus being on Eastwood and Jones. I think William Devane is an interesting actor, and I hope to see more of him (I know he's done a lot of television work, but his only film work that stands out in recent memory is last years' Payback). James Cromwell is good, but he isn't really given much to do here. If you're like me and are a huge Eastwood fan, but aren't really sure what to expect from this I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. 8/10 stars for this puppy. G'night!

Waterworld is a surprisingly good movie. I say ‘surprising' because with all the hype that surrounded this movie before its release, it got blasted by critics who seemed to focus more on the movies budget (it had the largest one for its time) than the actual film itself. Could someone explain to me why critics suddenly become accountants whenever a movie causes a stir in Hollywood because of its budget? I'd really like to know where that comes from. If the movie's good, it's good, if it's bad, it's bad, it doesn't matter what the budget is. Blair Witch Project proved that. Waterworld is filled with some interesting stunts, including a few things that I've never seen in film before. It has some cool ideas, but few that stand up to any real scrutiny. But it's fun sci-fi, with the emphasis on the fiction more than the science part.

Yes, Waterworld is not without its faults, but it is still a decent enough adventure flick. It's been called "Mad Max on water", although it's much less grim than Max. Its story actually more resembles the sequel to Max, The Road Warrior (anyone who has seen it will recognize many of the plot elements). Costner gives the standard Costner performance, which isn't bad if that's what you like (personally, I kinda like him, but at the same time I've never had to work with him). And ya gotta hand it to Hopper, he really throws himself into his villain roles. The guys a riot, I always look forward to him as the nasty one. I wonder if he has as much fun playing the characters more based in reality in the lower-budget, more independent films he's been doing the last few years as opposed to the larger than life bad guys he's played earlier in the nineties (no doubt the catering is better on the big budget action flicks). I guess I just liked the spirit of this movie, enough so to give it a 7/10 stars. You really can't measure a films worth by its budget. The best you can hope for is to be entertained in this type of film, and I think it delivers quite nicely. G'night!

Hollow Man is a ride, baby. It isn't scary as the ads would have you believe, but I'll be dammed if it isn't one of the most entertaining horror flicks I've seen in a while. In this age of computer generated, digital effects I have a hard time telling good special effects from bad (they all start to look the same after a while), but this one has a few of the most impressive sequences I've ever seen on film. I assume this is one of the most special effect-intensive movies ever attempted (aside form the latest Star Wars), and they do dazzle, so it's a shame the story doesn't quite measure up. It starts to get a little tired in the third act, but what the hell, I was entertained.

Aside form Kevin Bacon, there were no real stand-out performances in Hollow Man. The invisibility serum seems to bring on severe emotional instability in animals, so Bacon's character decides to try it out on himself. Problem is, Kevin is already nuttier than squirrel turds so this is not the smartest of decisions, but he runs the project, so he calls the shots. Mayhem ensues. This is a really clever idea for a horror film, and the smart ways the scientists think of to detect Bacon in his invisible form never ceases to impress. It's nice to see technology has finally made it so that they can do just about anything you can think of in film.

Paul Verhoeven is what makes this movie most attractive for me. I really love his go-for-broke, over the top directing style, and it's put to good use in this one especially. He took a step in the right direction by distancing himself from hack-supreme Joe Esterhaus in the entertaining but flawed Starship Troopers, and now he's back on his feet again. I can just picture him screaming like a madman on set, frothing at the mouth for "more blood, MORE BLOOD!". He doesn't shy away from gore, violence, sex, or anything. He just jumps right in. I like that. This movie is worth about an 8/10 stars. Worth the price of admission for the effects alone. G'night!

Indiana Jones is really something different from anything else I've seen in the movies. Sure, there have been other adventure films before and after Indy, but as your watching the movies themselves, it almost feels like an untapped formula that's never been used to good effect in anything else. The Last Crusade, like the other films in the series is one huge action sequence after another. It has enough energy in any 15 minutes of film than most movies can muster in two hours. Spielberg is an entertainment machine, he knows exactly what works and what people like to see. The man is a genius in the ways he works the audience, and like many of the films on his resume, it's something only he could have pulled off.

Harrison Ford in his prime is a thing of beauty, my friends. Oh, don't get me wrong, I'm totally for the ladies, but ya gotta admit, he's a good looking man. Indiana is charming and funny, cool under pressure, and makes you want to grab a bull whip and a fedora hat and go hunt for hidden treasures, it's just too bad there aren't any Nazis to shoot along the way, gosh darnit. Sean Connery is a hoot as his old man, Dr. Jones Sr., perfectly cast as the comic relief and one of many quirky characters to inhabit the Jones films. River Phoenix does good in a very light hearted opening sequence as young Indy. I guess for me the star of the movie is Spielberg, Spielberg, Spielberg! The man can do no wrong, and him and Lucas working together is like a fanboys dream come true! I kinda hope we might see another, but the years go by and Ford is only getting older. 9/10 stars for this Indy. G'night!

Okay, the movie that I thought would be the biggest flop of the summer is actually pretty damn cool. I admit it, I was wrong. Mr. Singer, cast and crew, I apologize, I shall never doubt you again (except for that idiot Halle Berry, thank God she barely has any dialogue here). Actually, this movie is much better than it has any right to be. The potential for embarrassment was huge. We have a director who has never directed a commercial hit-special effects film before, a cast of mostly unknowns and a bunch of super heroes in leather suits with goofy powers. And lets not forget a final battle taking place on top of the Statue of Liberty. But I'll be a son of a gun if Singer didn't do it, and do it well.

After an opening sequence that is as moving and dramatic as anything I've seen all year, I knew I was in for something special. I've been reading the book for about 15 years now, so I'm one of those types that the media was focusing on as the movie opened up around the world. Yes, it's all true, we are all pale friendless virgins who obsess over every little detail of the book (sadly, this IS true for many of the books readers. Comics just seem to bring out the anal-retentive types). So it's safe to say that I had some interest in how the movie would come out. Wolverine is my all time favourite character, and after seeing this, all I can say is that Hugh Jackman IS Wolverine! It was uncanny. I just sat there thinking, "This guy is Wolverine! Could this be any cooler?". Others may not have this reaction, mind you. If Jackman plays his cards right after this, he could become a major star in Hollywood. Keep an eye on this guy.

Something that really surprised me was how well the relationship between Xavier and Magnus was handled. The few scenes that they share are some of my favourites. McKellen and Stewart are the two thespians of the cast, so this should be no surprise, but they captured the unusual friendship they share very well. Magneto is and always will be the Malcolm X to Professor Xavier's Martin Luther King in the fight for peace between mutants and humans. They other villains have mostly non-speaking roles, but they do their jobs well. I hope Ray Park fans noticed the little homage he did to Darth Maul in one scene. Cute. The good guys get a little more screen time, the standouts being Jackman, Stewart and young Anna Paquin who is adorable as the cursed Rogue. She's a scene stealer in this one, and the relationship she has with Wolverine is very sweet (a part played by Kitty Pryde and then Jubilee in the comic). Famke Janssen provides sparks (and is easy on the eyes. Yum!), and James Marsden is pretty cool as Cyclops, a character who is usually hard to do anything with. I also thought the scene involving Xavier's journey via Cerebro to the psi-plane was very visually interesting. They took something that had always been rather obscure in the comics and made it look very simple yet fascinating on screen.

No real complaints here. The third act leaves a little something to be desired (I thought the end battle was maybe a little unspectacular), but otherwise this was great. The movie has the same problem that the book often faces, which is, "how do we get rid of Xavier before the final battle?", because when you think about it, when you have the most powerful psi on the planet on your side the rest of your team seems a little redundant. From the sounds of things this one will make one hell of a DVD, with a rumoured 45 minutes worth of cuts made before it was released to speed it up (some say at the character's expense). We are witnessing the birth of a franchise here. They could probably release an X-Men film once every two or three years like the Bond films. The story possibilities are endless, if they wanted they could just lift them from the comic. They have the Dark Phoenix Saga, The X-Cutioner's Song, Inferno, The Mutant Massacre, The Phalanx Covenant and so many more. If they want new villains, why not use Mojo, Mr. Sinister, Apocalypse, Onslaught, The Hellfire Club, The Shadow King, etc. Unlimited potential, really. I very much enjoyed this one, and it deserves a 9/10 stars for impressing me so much. G'night!

I have a lot of problems with What Lies Beneath, the least of which was that the idiots who edited the previews gave away some key information about the movie, something that isn't revealed until a good hour into it! I swear to God, these people must live in caves in the woods. Y'know, it's one thing when you can figure out where the movie is headed as your watching it, but it's another when your told exactly what will happen. If it were a friend that told me about the surprises, I would slap them.This is a trend in Hollywood that I want to see taken care of right away.

Okay, here's the deal, I don't dislike this movie but at the same time I can't really say that I liked it. I wasn't even going to bother seeing it because I could tell from the previews that I wasn't going to like it, but I got bullied into going so eventually I gave in and went to a matinee. My first reaction was, "Could someone tell me when Harrison Ford and Michelle Pfeiffer got so old?". They look positively ancient in this movie. I know Ford is getting up there in years, but I mean, Jesus! That's why they have make-up people. Dude is looking more and more like Yoda every day. Catwoman, where for art thou?

My main problem is the scares. This movie has them, but it doesn't EARN them. I'm a bit of a horror movie connoisseur (well, not really, I just love them all), and the scares are just so damn predictable because you've seen them done in about a million other movies. When ever you see a reflective surface, you know something is going to appear when the camera pans over to give you a full view, when someone opens a door or cupboard and you can't see what's behind it, you know when they close it someone will be standing there, when a door slowly creeps open the thought on everyones mind is, "Okay, will it be the dog or her husband?", when you're looking threw a knothole in the fence, of coarse the most surprising thing your going to see is someone staring back at you. But it's not a surprise because you know what's going to happen. When I jumped a few times in this movie, it's not because I was terrified at what I was seeing on screen, I was just waiting for the sudden, loud burst of music to startle me.

This movie only honestly earned a couple of it's scares, one toward the beginning and one toward the end. And what about that ending? Did anyone buy that, or was it just me? Hey, I like a good twist as much as the next guy, but this was really unbelievable. What a terrible script. This movie had one thing going for it, and his name is Robert Zemeckis, and I swear I'm not even a fan of his. Back to the Future is a classic, and Forrest Gump is a cute movie but way to syrupy for me. I think he could have done better with a decent script, and so could the stars in what was some very dull roles. But the paycheck cleared so everyone's happy I suppose. 6/10 stars it gets, not for being good, but for not sucking as bad as I thought. Not the most glowing endorsement for a movie, but it's all I can manage. G'night!

Jaws is probably on my list as one of my five favorite films of all time. I never get tired of watching this movie. It's just got one of those feelings that Hollywood will never, ever be able to reproduce. I doubt there is anything I could say about this movie that would do it justice and that others haven't already said better than I, so i'll just mention a few of the things that make me keep on coming back for more.

So many to chose from... well, there is the shark, of coarse. Brilliant move by Spielberg in not showing it until the third act. In fact, the scenes where you don't see him are scarier, like the guy that gets knocked off his boat in the pond, where we get our first glimpse of the shark gliding under the water towards him and pulling him under. Frightening. The cast, Scheider, Dreyfuss and Shaw are incredible. Shaw totally steals every scene he's in. This has to be one of the most quoted films in pop culture with lines like, "We're gonna need a bigger boat", "This was no boating accident! It wasn't any propellor, it wasn't any coral reef and it wasn't Jack the Ripper. It was a shark", "Uh, I think it's clear that you are going to ignore this particular problem until it swims up and bites you in the ass!", and just about everything Robert Shaw says. Every bit of praise this movie has recieved it has earned.

I happened upon the latest release of the film recently. The 25th anniversary edition, complete with a "making of", deleted scenes and outakes. Definately money well spent, even if you already own it, run out and buy this on video or DVD. What makes it worth it? Well, the scene with Quint going to the music shop to buy piano wire is worth the price of admission alone, I laughed so hard! The "making of" feature was filled with juicy facts, including Spielberg setting the record straight on who actually wrote the famous (and brilliant) U.S.S. Indianapolis speech delivered by Shaw, a scene that almost every writer working in Hollywood at that time has taken credit for at one time or another. And with good reason, it's a memorable one. I loved every minute of it. This movie is a classic no matter how you cut it. 10/10 stars, and worth every one! G'night!

Dear God, has it been this long? Is this movie really fifteen years old? Well, Mathew Broderick hasn't aged a day since (must be drinking the same magic sauce as Dick Clark. I think it's called embalming fluid). I decided to watch this again the other day to see if it was as good as I remembered it. It had been about ten years since I had last seen it, and you know how movies from your youth are never as good as you remembered them. Well, this one is every bit as good now as it was then. I love this movie!

There are just too many good things about this movie to mention. Broderick is instantly likeable as Ferris. Makes you wish you had a buddy like him back in school, if for no other reason than to get close to his hottie of a girlfriend (Mia Sara). For some reason, I keep thinking of Alan Ruck as being the most outstanding character in this movie. He gives a very sweet performance as Cameron, Ferris' loser friend. He actually has the most performance-intensive role in this one. And what a cast! I was most looking forward to seeing Ben Stein again, and a hilarious cameo by Charlie Sheen, and they didn't disapoint. Oh, but that's not all folks, we also have Jeffrey Jones as the principle ("Rooney Eats It!"). He's great. Even better is Jennifer Grey as Ferris' sister, ‘Shawna-Jean'. I love her attitude.

John Hughes, where for art thou? Seems he's been writing a lot for the last ten years. Yikes! I took a look at his resume and it's not a pretty sight. I think the 80's was his decade. Anyway, this one is easily his greatest film. Everything just clicks. This one is easily a 10/10 stars on my scale. G'night!